Right Attitudes

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Anxiety

Feeling Is the Enemy of Thinking—Sometimes

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Responsive vs. Reactive Behavior: Feeling is the Enemy of Thinking A thing can feel bad and be right.

Or it can feel good and be wrong.

It’s a quiet distinction—easily missed, but central to personal wisdom.

It’s tempting to let emotion guide your ethical compass. But how something feels isn’t always a trustworthy measure of what’s right.

Feelings are powerful—but not infallible.

To live thoughtfully is to ask: “Does this feel right, or is it truly right?”

That question opens the door to deeper discernment, separating impulse from principle, gratification from growth.

The ability to think beyond emotional distortion is a cornerstone of wisdom. It asks you to look past immediacy and self-interest, and to judge your actions by consequence, ethics, and truth. That clarity builds a life shaped by integrity, not impulse.

Feelings are persuasive. They echo survival, not morality.

They are weather, not climate.

To live wisely is to respect their presence—and step beyond their sway.

Idea for Impact: Growth begins where reaction ends.

Wondering what to read next?

  1. Embracing the Inner Demons Without Attachment: The Parable of Milarepa
  2. Cope with Anxiety and Stop Obsessive Worrying by Creating a Worry Box
  3. Seven Ways to Let Go of Regret
  4. Expressive Writing Can Help You Heal
  5. This May Be the Most Potent Cure for Melancholy

Jeju Air Flight 2216—The Alleged Failure to Think Clearly Under Fire

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How Situational Blindness Caused the American Airlines-Black Hawk Fatal Collision Near Reagan National Airport Yet another preliminary report from a fatal airline accident leaves crucial details unresolved and continues to fuel debate—echoing the intense scrutiny surrounding the Air India 171 crash.

In December 2024, Jeju Air Flight 2216 crash-landed at South Korea’s Muan International Airport. The Boeing 737–800 aircraft touched down without deploying its landing gear, overshot the runway at high speed, and struck a concrete structure supporting the Instrument Landing System (ILS) localizer beacon. The resulting fire claimed 179 of the 181 lives on board, marking South Korea’s deadliest aviation disaster in recent decades.

A leaked version of the initial findings indicates that both engines were hit by birds during final approach. The right engine suffered extensive damage, emitting flames and thick black smoke, while the left engine maintained sufficient thrust. Despite this, the flight crew allegedly shut down the left engine. No mechanical faults were found in the aircraft or its engines. Investigators also noted a critical data gap: both the cockpit voice recorder (CVR) and flight data recorder (FDR) ceased functioning approximately four minutes before impact, leaving key questions about the crew’s decision-making unanswered. The preliminary report avoids definitive conclusions regarding crew actions, citing limitations in scope.

Aviation experts have expressed frustration over the absence of conclusive evidence about the crew’s decisions—particularly given the missing CVR and FDR data. Shutting down a functioning engine dramatically limits aircraft control and reduces the chance of executing a go-around or controlled landing. The report has also drawn criticism for downplaying airport infrastructure flaws. The structure the aircraft collided with was made of non-frangible material—contrary to international safety standards, which recommend breakaway designs to mitigate impact severity. If it emerges that the emergency landing was skillfully executed, the aircraft might have skidded further and come to a natural stop. A final, more comprehensive report is expected next summer.

If early findings are confirmed—especially the shutdown of the less-damaged engine—this accident may serve as another tragic example of cognitive overload under intense stress. Pilots in high-pressure situations can experience “narrowing of the cognitive map,” a phenomenon where tunnel vision compromises situational awareness and hinders sound decision-making. Inattentional blindness may also cause individuals to miss vital environmental cues—a pattern I’ve observed in numerous other aviation incidents covered on this blog.

Wondering what to read next?

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  3. How Stress Impairs Your Problem-Solving Capabilities: Case Study of TransAsia Flight 235
  4. What Airline Disasters Teach About Cognitive Impairment and Decision-Making Under Stress
  5. Under Pressure, The Narrowing Cognitive Map: Lessons from the Tragedy of Singapore Airlines Flight 6

Seven Ways to Let Go of Regret

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Ways to Let Go of Regret: Let go, learn, adapt, forgive, focus forward, embrace growth, reclaim joy. Regret is a backward-looking emotion. It’s an evaluation of past choices—regret arises from the discrepancy between what was and what could have been. Letting go of it is tough because it’s tangled with self-reproach, the dread of lost potential, and the discomfort of admitting errors, trapping us in “what ifs.”

  1. Leave the past behind—regret traps you there. Dwelling on what could’ve been drains the joy from today.
  2. Stop magnifying mistakes. Overanalyzing makes them seem bigger than they are.
  3. Forgive yourself. Forgiving yourself demands more effort than forgiving others, but it shapes your ability to move forward.
  4. Choose self-acceptance over self-pity. Mistakes don’t define you.
  5. Take control of your inner dialogue. Replace negativity with empowering truths.
  6. Extract lessons from every experience—growth comes from reflection.
  7. Tackle regrets head-on. Awareness and action are the only ways to move forward.

Idea for Impact: Dwelling on mistakes gets you nowhere. When life knocks you down, take a moment to process the setback—then move forward. The ability to rebound quickly from failures and disappointments is one of the key differentiators between successful and unsuccessful people.

Wondering what to read next?

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  4. The More You Can Manage Your Emotions, the More Effective You’ll Be
  5. Expressive Writing Can Help You Heal

A Thief’s Trial by Fire

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The Burglar's Son: A Zen Parable of Trial and Fire There’s a purported Zen parable that goes like this: A seasoned thief brings his son to a wealthy man’s house in the dead of night. They sneak inside, and the father carefully guides the son through the process—finding valuables, avoiding noise, and staying hidden. At one point, while the son is inside a room, the father suddenly slams the door shut and locks him in, then loudly raises the alarm before disappearing into the shadows.

Terrified and trapped, the son panics. But soon, his instincts kick in. He uses his wits, making a small noise to lure the household cat closer, then throws an object to startle it. The sudden movement and noise wake the household, creating confusion. Amid the chaos, the son seizes the moment, picks the lock, and escapes unseen.

Later, when he meets his father, exhausted and shaken, he asks why he was abandoned. The father laughs and says, “I wanted to test your mettle, son. Tonight, you learned the true essence of thievery—thinking on your feet.”

Idea for Impact: Adversity can be a powerful catalyst for resourcefulness. It’s a hard lesson, but one learned through real experience, not just instruction.

Wondering what to read next?

  1. What Airline Disasters Teach About Cognitive Impairment and Decision-Making Under Stress
  2. How Stress Impairs Your Problem-Solving Capabilities: Case Study of TransAsia Flight 235
  3. “Fly the Aircraft First”
  4. Jeju Air Flight 2216—The Alleged Failure to Think Clearly Under Fire
  5. Under Pressure, The Narrowing Cognitive Map: Lessons from the Tragedy of Singapore Airlines Flight 6

Is Low Self-Esteem Your Problem or Your Excuse?

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Is Low Self Esteem Your Problem or Your Excuse? Many people blame their problems on low self-esteem, but often this is just a way to dodge the harder truth: they might actually have lower intellectual, emotional, or social abilities.

If you think low self-esteem is your problem, consider whether it’s truly reflecting a reality that’s worse than it is. True low self-esteem occurs when your self-appraisal is harsher than reality.

Next time you attribute your issues to low self-esteem, ask yourself if the real problem might be lower ability. Using low self-esteem as an excuse can hinder your personal growth by shifting the focus away from practical solutions and onto self-defeating habits.

Idea for Impact: Instead of just trying to boost your self-esteem, focus on improving your skills, adjusting your expectations, or taking actionable steps. This approach will likely lead to stepped progress and help you overcome obstacles more effectively.

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  4. This ‘Morning Pages’ Practice is a Rebellion Against the Tyranny of Muddled Thinking
  5. Expressive Writing Can Help You Heal

Some Worry is Useful

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Some Worry is Useful - What Action Can You Take Now Worry can often feel overwhelming, but it usually serves a purpose. Some anxious thoughts can help you prepare, avoid surprises, and motivate action. To manage your worry effectively, ask yourself, “How is my worry helpful?” and “When does it become unproductive?”

Train yourself to differentiate between productive and unproductive thoughts. For instance, when preparing for a significant work presentation, channel your worry into action. Focus on researching your topic, creating slides, and practicing your delivery. This productive worry acts as your to-do list. In contrast, if you find yourself fretting about job loss, unproductive thoughts like “What if I can’t find a new job?” may arise. Instead of spiraling, take action—update your resume and start networking. If you’re worried about a family gathering, thoughts like “What if everyone argues?” distract you from what you can control. Instead, plan activities that foster conversation.

Idea for Impact: When worry strikes, ask, “Can I take action today?” If the answer is yes, get to work. Tackling your worries directly helps alleviate anxiety.

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  5. Thought Without Action is a Rehearsal for Irrelevance

‘Could’ Beats ‘Should’ Every Time

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Out with the Old in with the New: 'Could' Beats 'Should' Every Time Your workplace has transformed. Workloads have intensified, and home and work life have blurred into one. The world you knew has shifted, taking roles, responsibilities, and expectations with it. Yet, despite these changes, you might still hold yourself to the same expectations. Rather than adapting, you cling to outdated “shoulds”—a habit that often leads to burnout.

  • “Should” is an Illusion. True progress demands adapting to reality, not clinging to outdated standards that hold you back.
  • “Should” Blocks Exploration. Letting go of rigid “shoulds” opens doors to innovation and reduces unnecessary stress.
  • “Should” Belongs to the Past. Life evolves; real growth comes when you align goals with the present, not an idealized past.

Idea for Impact: Out with the old, in with the new. Let go of “shoulds” that lead to burnout. Recognize what’s changed, then re-evaluate your goals and set realistic boundaries. By trading “should” for “could,” you invite curiosity, allowing yourself to explore options without constraints. With “could,” you’re empowered to shape choices that are flexible and adaptable, building resilience and sparking creativity. Growth flourishes when you make space for what “could” be.

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Embracing the Inner Demons Without Attachment: The Parable of Milarepa

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Embracing the Inner Demons Without Attachment: The Parable of Milarepa

The Parable of Milarepa and the Demons, attributed to the 11th-century Tibetan yogi and poet Milarepa (1052–1135,) is a renowned fable from the Tibetan Buddhist tradition. It teaches a powerful lesson about inner transformation and the nature of suffering. Here’s a synopsis:

After returning to his cave from collecting firewood, Milarepa finds it swarming with demons. Initially, he confronts them directly, lecturing them on the Dharma and urging them to leave. However, his efforts prove futile, as the demons remain unresponsive. Realizing that resistance is fruitless, Milarepa adopts a different approach—he embraces the demons, inviting them to coexist with him and even offering himself as sustenance. This radical acceptance causes the demons to vanish, revealing their illusory nature. Through this encounter, Milarepa gains insight into the power of non-resistance and compassion in overcoming inner turmoil.

The parable is rich in symbolism, depicting the demons as manifestations of Milarepa’s negative thoughts, struggles, anxieties, and emotions. His attempts to suppress or fight them only strengthen their hold. However, when he treats them with kindness, he recognizes their true nature as projections of his own mind.

By transforming the demons into allies, Milarepa strips them of their power to torment him, causing them to dissolve into light. This tale illustrates the essence of true liberation in Buddhist philosophy: rooted in acceptance, understanding, and compassion for oneself.

Overall, this fable serves as a powerful metaphor for spiritual growth, demonstrating how we can overcome negativity. True freedom arises from acknowledging reality rather than denying it. Mindfulness fosters non-judgmental awareness, while recognizing suffering’s impermanence reduces attachment.

Idea for Impact: Inner transformation begins within; compassion and self-awareness transmute inner demons, leading to wisdom, peace, and freedom from suffering.

Wondering what to read next?

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  2. Anger is the Hardest of the Negative Emotions to Subdue
  3. Learn to Manage Your Negative Emotions and Yourself
  4. This May Be the Most Potent Cure for Melancholy
  5. Seven Ways to Let Go of Regret

In Imperfection, the True Magic of the Holidays Shines

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In Imperfection, the True Magic of the Holidays Shines Amid the holiday rush, the pressure to create a flawlessly decorated home and a picture-perfect celebration can be overwhelming. However, the truth is that your home doesn’t need to mirror a Pinterest fantasy or a glossy magazine spread, and your Christmas feast doesn’t have to meet Martha Stewart’s standards.

Be realistic about holiday preparations. Even for those who thrive on meticulous planning, maintaining a spotless home can be a tall order, especially with more people than usual under one roof. Don’t burden yourself with the pursuit of perfection. Instead, focus on what genuinely matters and address the areas that truly bother you, while letting some things slide.

Remember, the heart of the holidays lies in spending quality time with loved ones and enjoying cherished traditions. The quirks and imperfections of your home? They give it character and warmth. Embrace those cozy, imperfect moments that make holiday celebrations truly special.

Idea for Impact: Imperfection makes the holiday season perfect by embracing the charm of spontaneous moments and genuine connections over meticulously planned perfection.

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How to … Embrace the Transience of Emotions

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How to Embrace the Transience of Emotions Buddhism teaches that developing a mindful and compassionate relationship with your emotions means seeing them as temporary states rather than defining parts of who you are. By accepting and acknowledging feelings like anxiety and depression without judgment or attachment, you allow them to come and go naturally.

Sociologist and Buddhist therapist Kamilah Majied writes in Joyfully Just: Black Wisdom and Buddhist Insights for Liberated Living (2024):

It is important to develop friendly relationships with our painful emotions so that we don’t become anxious about feeling anxious or depressed about feeling depressed. If we can welcome feelings as natural states that pass eventually, we can know great peace.

It can also be useful to not identify with a painful feeling, because at the same time you are experiencing it, you are also experiencing other feelings. So instead of saying “I am depressed,” you might say, “I notice some depression moving through me.”

What other feelings are moving through you? Are there any pleasant feelings in there? These kinds of reflective practices can help you balance your awareness and be more connected to the possibilities for peace and joy in each moment.

Idea for Impact: Remember, you’re more than just your feelings—they don’t define who you are. Bearing this in mind, you won’t get overwhelmed by them or let them control your sense of self. This perspective helps you better understand the constant shifts in your experiences.

Wondering what to read next?

  1. Embracing the Inner Demons Without Attachment: The Parable of Milarepa
  2. Anger is the Hardest of the Negative Emotions to Subdue
  3. Cope with Anxiety and Stop Obsessive Worrying by Creating a Worry Box
  4. Expressive Writing Can Help You Heal
  5. The Law of Petty Irritations