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A Taxonomy of Troubles: Summary of Tiffany Watt Smith’s ‘The Book of Human Emotions’

October 1, 2025 By Nagesh Belludi Leave a Comment

'The Book of Human Emotions' by Tiffany Watt Smith (ISBN 0316265403) Some books aren’t designed to be read front to back. Tiffany Watt Smith’s The Book of Human Emotions (2016) is a perfect example. It’s a compendium, a literary grab bag where readers can open to any page and uncover a curious nugget about the strange terrain of human feeling. Whether it launches a dinner-table debate or sends you into a cultural rabbit hole, its charm lies in its delightfully unsystematic approach.

Smith, a cultural historian focusing on the history of emotion, offers a colorful tour of the emotional spectrum. Some entries are instantly relatable; others are wonderfully obscure. The format is encyclopedic, ranging from single-sentence definitions to multi-page explorations. There’s basorexia, the sudden urge to kiss, and iktsuarpok, the anxious anticipation of someone’s arrival. Smith notes in the introduction that the modern idea of “emotions” didn’t appear until the 1830s. Before then, feelings were blamed on faulty souls or imbalanced bodily fluids like bile or phlegm.

The book is more than just a glossary; it’s threaded with sharp cultural insights—when a language has a specific word for a concept, it often indicates that this concept is culturally important, frequently discussed, or central to how people interact and understand their world. Smith touches on the aggressively enforced cheeriness of American customer service, a strange mandate for mandatory happiness that somehow leaves everyone slightly gloomier. She also highlights curiosities like awumbuk (from Papua New Guinea,) the oddly specific feeling of emptiness after guests leave, and the Dutch concept of gezelligheid, capturing the warmth of shared companionship.

Recommendation: Leaf through The Book of Human Emotions. Though the concept occasionally feels stretched, perhaps suggesting the author discovered that emotions alone might not justify an entire book, it remains engaging throughout. Smith writes with clarity and wit, avoiding the heaviness of academic prose. This is the kind of book that earns its place on the coffee table. It’s best enjoyed in fragments, one curious entry at a time, gently reminding us how language and culture shape what we feel and how we understand each other.

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Filed Under: Effective Communication, Ideas and Insights, Sharpening Your Skills Tagged With: Assertiveness, Attitudes, Communication, Conversations, Meaning, Parables, Persuasion, Psychology

The Mere Exposure Effect: Why We Fall for the Most Persistent

September 1, 2025 By Nagesh Belludi Leave a Comment

Repetition Until Enlightenment: The Mere Exposure Effect Explains Why We Fall for the Most Persistent

GEICO is renowned for its relentless and quirky advertising. Its auto insurance campaigns feature a memorable, rotating cast of mascots, most famously a talking gecko with a British accent proclaiming the catchy “15% in 15 minutes.” Also prominent are a group of cavemen, hilariously offended by the notion that buying insurance is “so easy, even a caveman could do it,” and a cheerful camel celebrating Hump Day. These ads are everywhere: television, radio, online—even pre-rolls before YouTube videos. The repetition isn’t accidental—it’s strategic. GEICO has laced its brand into consumers’ consciousness by brute repetition. We’re not so much convinced by GEICO as held hostage by its consistency. And it works. We know them. We might even trust them—begrudgingly.

That’s a prime example of the Mere Exposure Effect. Coined by psychologist Robert Zajonc, this mental model describes the human tendency to prefer things simply because we’ve encountered them before. It’s a cognitive shortcut: familiarity breeds comfort, and comfort breeds trust—not because the thing is better, but because it’s known.

Exposure: The Unseen Influence

Consider also the example of Empire Today, a company that sells installed carpet, hardwood, and vinyl flooring. But what it sells most effectively is its phone number. “800-588-2300 Empire Today!” is a jingle that’s been broadcast across U.S. television and radio since the 1970s. It’s not catchy in the traditional sense. It’s simply repeated so often that it becomes part of the mental wallpaper. We don’t need to know what Empire does to know how to reach them. That’s the power of exposure.

McDonald's McDonald’s has long leaned on jingles like “I’m Lovin’ It,” which, while not musically profound, have been repeated for decades. This repetition creates emotional anchoring. We associate the tune with the brand, and that association influences behavior. Ba-da-ba-ba-ba.

But repetition is a blade that dulls quickly. When exposure becomes saturation, we turn away. The trick is knowing when to stop before we reach for the mute button. This effect isn’t limitless—it’s a tightrope.

And it doesn’t just live in advertising. It’s stitched into daily life. We reach for the song we’ve played thirty times because it feels safe. We favor faces we recognize in crowds because unfamiliarity feels like risk. Familiarity smooths the world’s sharp edges. We call it instinct, but often it’s just recall with better PR.

How Repetition Rewires Your Preferences

We’re drawn not only to the thing itself, but to its repetition, its stability. Something consistent across time and place—same colors, same voice, same message—feels trustworthy. And when others start echoing that message, the effect deepens. Exposure transforms into consensus, and suddenly what’s familiar becomes what’s “right.”

We don’t choose what we like as much as we think. We gravitate toward what we’ve seen, heard, and scrolled past enough times for our brains to say, “Sure, why not.” The Mere Exposure Effect doesn’t shout—it accumulates. And by the time we realize how much it’s shaped our tastes, we’ve already bought in.

Idea for Impact: Familiarity breeds trust, often without scrutiny. Over-familiarity channels the lazy mind. We stop questioning not when we’re convinced, but when we’re accustomed.

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Filed Under: Business Stories, MBA in a Nutshell, Mental Models, Sharpening Your Skills Tagged With: Assertiveness, Biases, Communication, Creativity, Innovation, Marketing, Mental Models, Parables, Persuasion, Psychology

Most Writing Is Bad Because It Doesn’t Know Why It Exists

July 10, 2025 By Nagesh Belludi Leave a Comment

Most Writing Is Bad Because It Doesn't Know Why It Exists Ask anyone who has ever written something that actually worked—a punchy social post, a compelling blog entry, a persuasive ad, or even a user manual that finally made sense—and they’ll tell you: it didn’t begin with confidence or inspiration. It started with motive. Real motive. Before the first sentence hit the page, there was already a reason burning behind it. Writing wasn’t a search for clarity. It was the final execution of it.

In college editing classes, students are often introduced to the concept of exigence in rhetorical theory. This aligns perfectly with the idea that strong writing needs two things: a clear thesis and a compelling motive. While the thesis is usually straightforward, the motive—that deeper reason the piece truly deserves to exist—often leaves students blank. Ask why they wrote a particular essay, and the most common answer is, “Because it was assigned.”

That’s not a motive. That’s compliance. And it’s exactly why so much writing feels hollow. The form may be polished, but the pulse is missing.

Writing without motive is like swinging a sword at fog. There’s motion, but no impact.

What readers truly want to know is this: What gripped the writer’s mind hard enough to make them sit down and wrestle with a blank page rather than scroll TikTok or eat cereal straight from the box? Why this topic, and why now?

Idea for Impact: If a writer can answer that—whether it’s obsession, frustration, or a question that won’t let go—the piece gains traction. The spark becomes visible. And maybe, just maybe, the reader will feel it too.

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Filed Under: Effective Communication, Mental Models Tagged With: Assertiveness, Communication, Conversations, Critical Thinking, Marketing, Motivation, Persuasion, Writing

Some Influencers Just Aren’t Worth Placating

June 27, 2025 By Nagesh Belludi Leave a Comment

Some Influencers Just Aren't Worth Placating Recent news of Carnival Cruise Group’s decision to ban two “influencers” after a run of negative reviews has sparked a spirited debate online.

Many are quick to label the move as corporate censorship, but a closer look reveals it’s often just basic business sense. This wasn’t about silencing genuine critique—it was about a company recognizing that some forms of “feedback” are merely thinly veiled demands from the perpetually aggrieved.

These influencers weren’t ordinary customers offering fair assessments. Their dissatisfaction seemed to operate as a business model, consistently leveraged for perks like free cruises, suite upgrades, and even a comped wedding. When complaints reliably yield such significant compensation, dissatisfaction ceases to be an affliction and instead becomes a profitable asset. To be banned for one’s “opinion,” when that “opinion” primarily consists of a tiresome enumeration of petty defects after repeated indulgence, isn’t martyrdom—it’s simply mistaking self-importance for actual consequence.

More broadly, this incident reflects the growing commodification of outrage in the digital age. Social media thrives on grievance, and the influencer economy demands perpetual dissatisfaction. Negative reviews generate more engagement, effectively turning critique into performance rather than honest, balanced appraisal. The notion that discomforts—however generously compensated—constitute a public service worthy of widespread dissemination speaks volumes about the peculiar vanity of our time.

Carnival’s move isn’t a crackdown; it’s a necessary correction. Businesses have their limits—budget cruise lines cater to specific market segments and set clear expectations. When influencers review these companies as if they were luxury brands and consistently post negative reviews based on unmet, unrealistic expectations, they unfairly damage the company’s reputation. Removing those who ceaselessly publicize a company’s purported defects, even after extensive placation, isn’t suppression—it’s long-overdue pragmatism.

Criticism is healthy, but the expectation that companies must endlessly placate serial complainers isn’t consumer advocacy—it’s entitlement masquerading as accountability.

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Avoid the Trap of Desperate Talk

November 7, 2024 By Nagesh Belludi Leave a Comment

Avoid the Trap of Desperate Talk Whether you’re hunting for a job, negotiating a raise, or seeking a romantic partner, exuding confidence is key. But keeping up that confidence can be tough when you’re feeling desperate.

Desperation often leads to fixating on a single goal, which can create overwhelming pressure and cloud your judgment. This can make the stakes seem higher than they actually are.

Watch out for words and phrases in your thinking that convey desperation or a high level of pressure, such as “must,” “always,” “have to,” “need to,” “cannot afford to,” “unacceptable,” “critical,” and “urgent.”

  • Instead of stressing, “I can’t afford to mess up this interview,” try thinking, “I’ll prepare as best as I can and give it my all. Whatever happens, it’s a valuable learning experience.”
  • Instead of “I must please everyone,” tell yourself, “I’ll be considerate and respectful to everyone’s opinions, but it’s okay if I can’t make everyone happy all the time. My main focus should be staying true to myself and my values.”
  • Instead of pleading, “You must let me help you,” say, “I’d really like to help. If it’s not a good fit, no worries—there are others who might benefit more.”

Just like the proverbial mouse with only one hole is easily trapped, relying on a single option leaves you vulnerable if that option fails. Having alternatives or backup plans helps you avoid being caught off guard by unexpected issues.

If you’re going to a job interview, continue seeking other opportunities. Before asking for a raise, consider other requests like training, flexible hours, or an assistant. Before renegotiating your salary, explore the market—there might be other employers eager to offer you a competitive salary.

Idea for Impact: Build redundancy and flexibility into your plans to ensure greater security and resilience. Keep your options open and avoid putting all your eggs in one basket.

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Filed Under: Living the Good Life, Mental Models, Sharpening Your Skills Tagged With: Attitudes, Body Language, Communication, Conversations, Emotions, Mindfulness, Negotiation, Perfectionism, Relationships, Risk, Suffering

Silence the Noise

July 11, 2024 By Nagesh Belludi Leave a Comment

Data Overload: Drowning Wisdom in a Sea of Garbage The prevailing belief suggests that the more access we have to information, the greater our knowledge and, subsequently, our wisdom.

However, reality paints a different picture. Instead of fostering deeper comprehension and insight, the influx of information often leads to a need for more judgment, understanding, and wisdom. The sheer volume of data, lacking proper context and interpretation, clouds rather than clarifies our understanding of the world.

This inundation of information has also cultivated a culture where one of the gravest social faux pas is to appear uninformed and lacking opinions, spanning topics from politics to what’s trending in pop culture. Consequently, we hastily form opinions based on fragmentary information and surface-level impressions, rather than genuine understanding. Moreover, there’s a noticeable emphasis on quick, witty exchanges, often at the expense of more profound and reflective communication.

This societal pressure to always have an answer shuts down our curiosity and makes it hard to admit when we’re clueless about something. Meaningful discourse and genuine understanding are often sacrificed at the altar of social expectations.

Idea for Impact: Wisdom resides not in the torrent of noise. Value depth over breadth.

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Filed Under: Mental Models, Sharpening Your Skills Tagged With: Communication, Critical Thinking, Discipline, Mental Models, Mindfulness, Persuasion

Honest Commitments: Saying ‘No’ is Kindness

April 25, 2024 By Nagesh Belludi Leave a Comment

Kindness in Honesty: Saying 'No' with Integrity Saying ‘yes’ when you really mean ‘no,’ even ‘maybe,’ is lying (Note: lying is a specific action; it requires the intent to deceive the other person.)

If you’re uncertain, you can say, “Yeah, maybe; I’ll let you know in a few days.” As opposed to “yes, I can do that” when you don’t know if that’s true.

If you’re inclined to say ‘yes’for conflict avoidance (say, when you think the other person can’t take a ‘no’ well,) you could get better at being assertive.

Sure, there’s the chance that you originally intended to follow through, but things have shifted and you may need to uncommit gracefully. But don’t make a habit of saying ‘yes’ when there’s no decent chance you can keep your commitment; it’s a burden on other people’s energy, time, and space.

Saying ‘no’—clearly and firmly when you know you can’t keep the commitment—is kindness.

Idea for Impact: Don’t say ‘yes’unless you mean ‘yes.’ Say ‘no’ when you don’t want to consent. It’s a kind thing to do. Most people appreciate sincerity and prefer others to mean what they say.

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Lessons from JFK’s Inspiration Moon Landing Speeches

March 4, 2024 By Nagesh Belludi Leave a Comment

When John F. Kennedy assumed the presidency in January 1961, the prevailing sentiment among many Americans was that the country was falling behind in the Space Race. This feeling was compounded by the Soviet Union’s successful launch of the first artificial satellite, Sputnik 1, four years earlier. Just three months into Kennedy’s tenure, Yuri Gagarin made history as the first man in space. Shortly thereafter, the Bay of Pigs debacle dealt another blow to America’s international standing.

Against this backdrop, Kennedy addressed Congress on May 25, 1961, with a bold proposal: America should commit to landing a man on the Moon and safely returning him to Earth before the decade’s end. He framed space exploration as a pivotal American endeavor, one with profound implications for the nation’s future. Kennedy emphasized that reaching the Moon would not be solely the achievement of astronauts but of the entire nation, calling for collective effort.

Lasting Legacy: JFK’s Influence on the Future of Space Exploration

JFK's Moon Mission Speech: Informing Public About Lunar Landing Goal Congress swiftly approved the substantial funding Kennedy requested, leading to a significant expansion of NASA. Within four years, the agency had grown ninefold from its size at the start of Kennedy’s presidency.

Kennedy’s speech marked a turning point in human space exploration, reshaping the dynamics of the Cold War and instilling a newfound sense of American potential. It sparked national pride and served as a catalyst for vast technological and educational advancements, reflecting the boundless aspirations of the era.

Kennedy’s declaration didn’t win over everyone. To drum up more excitement and boost his approval ratings, Kennedy delivered another speech at Rice Stadium on September 12, 1962, on the campus of Rice University in Houston, Texas. It was actually his brilliant speechwriter, Ted Sorensen, who employed rhetorical techniques to stir the audience’s emotions.

Using powerful imagery, Kennedy posed the question, “But why, some say, the moon? Why choose this as our goal? And they may well ask why climb the highest mountain?” He emphasized that the pursuit of the moon and other difficult tasks wasn’t because they were easy, but because they were hard.

Drawing parallels to the spirit of exploration, Kennedy likened the moon mission to the legendary ambition of George Mallory, the British explorer who perished on Mount Everest. Mallory, when asked why he wanted to climb the mountain, famously replied, “Because it is there.” Kennedy underscored the vastness of space as the next frontier, brimming with opportunities for knowledge and peace. He invoked divine blessings for what he described as the most perilous, daring, and grand adventure humanity had ever embarked upon.

The Power of Persuasion: Analyzing JFK’s Rhetorical Magic

Kennedy’s words resonated with a profound sense of optimism and possibility. He emphasized the imperative of pushing the boundaries of human achievement and exploration, fostering a collective national pride and unity in pursuit of a singular goal. This vision electrified thousands of employees across various roles at NASA, from astronauts to janitors, all rallying around the audacious objective of landing a man on the moon. Even those with seemingly mundane tasks found purpose in the grand mission, as evidenced by one non-scientist at NASA declaring, “I’m not mopping floors, I’m putting a man on the moon.”

Kennedy’s message held sway because he possessed a rare ability to vividly depict the distant future with precision. His speeches served as a clarion call for progress and innovation, positioning the United States as a vanguard in the space race amid the backdrop of the Cold War. By framing the moon landing as a symbol of American ingenuity and technological supremacy, he underscored its significance in the global arena.

JFK's NASA Vision: Advancing Scientific Frontiers Boldly Moreover, Kennedy streamlined NASA’s ambitions to focus on a singular objective: “to develop a new frontier in science.” Prior to Kennedy’s presidency, NASA’s vision had been sprawling and unfocused, aiming to achieve superiority in technology and space exploration. By narrowing the focus to one goal, Kennedy recognized the power of clarity and direction in driving progress.

Kennedy vividly portrayed the magnitude of the challenge, emphasizing its enormity: “No single space project … will be more impressive to mankind, or more important for the long-range exploration of space; and none will be so difficult or expensive to accomplish.”

Dreaming Big: How JFK’s Moon Speeches Transformed History

By aligning NASA’s and the nation’s vision to a tangible and ambitious objective, Kennedy galvanized action: “commit itself to achieving the goal, before this decade is out, of landing a man on the moon and returning him safely to the earth.” Setting a clear deadline spurred engagement and focus. Kennedy’s speeches marked a pivotal juncture in the space race, laying the groundwork for future exploration of the cosmos.

The key lesson to glean from this is to strive for concreteness in vision statements, avoiding abstraction whenever possible. The objective of landing a man on the moon felt tangible, immediate, and relatable compared to the vaguer aim of “advancing science.”

Indeed, the future remains shrouded in uncertainty. Our mental image of what lies ahead is often hazy, leading us to discuss it in broad, sweeping terms to maintain flexibility.

Idea for Impact: A compelling vision propels us beyond the familiar, guiding us into uncharted territory and expanding the limits of our conventional thinking.

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Filed Under: Career Development, Effective Communication, Great Personalities, Ideas and Insights, Sharpening Your Skills Tagged With: Communication, Conversations, Critical Thinking, Likeability, Listening, Marketing, Mindfulness, Persuasion, Presentations

The Problem with Hiring Smart People

January 23, 2024 By Nagesh Belludi Leave a Comment

Smart people are puzzled by initial resistance and slow uptake Hiring smart individuals indeed adds valuable intellectual capital to organizations, but it also brings about unique challenges. The struggle emerges as these individuals try to grasp why their brilliant ideas face initial resistance and why others don’t catch on as quickly.

Smart individuals become frustrated when dealing with skeptics among their colleagues, having to invest precious time in aligning the team without coming off as bossy—especially when collaborating with peers over whom they lack direct authority. The aggravation intensifies as they would prefer to generate more genius ideas than get caught up in the challenge of convincing others about concepts that seem like a no-brainer to them.

Idea for Impact: Smart folks, don’t overlook relationship-building skills; intelligence isn’t everything for your goals.

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Why Good Founding Stories Sell: Stories That Appeal, Stories That Relate

October 16, 2023 By Nagesh Belludi Leave a Comment

It’s the most famous “founding” story ever told. Isaac Newton often told it himself. William Stukeley first published it. Voltaire popularized it.

In 1666, Newton was strolling in a garden in Lincolnshire when he saw an apple drop from a tree. The fruit fell straight to the earth as if tugged by an invisible force. (Subsequent versions of this story had the apple striking Newton on the head.)

That mundane observation seemingly led Newton to conceive the notion of universal gravitation, which explained everything from the falling apple to the moon’s orbit. Whether it was true or not, the apple episode probably motivated Newton. But, indeed, he did not arrive at his theory of gravity at that single moment, as is commonly believed.

Most Origin Stories Make a Good Yarn

Fast-forward three and a half centuries, from England to California. Today, the “Eureka Moment” narrative is a Silicon Valley staple.

Most founding stories would rather you believe that brilliant entrepreneurs came about the outstanding idea for their startups in an almost Moses-like manner. In reality, though, that’s not the real story of how some of our iconic companies began.

When eBay launched, it gained loads of fanfare by proclaiming that Pierre Omidyar and his fiancée built the “Auction Web” to buy and collect Pez candy dispensers on the nascent internet. According to Adam Cohen’s The Perfect Store: Inside eBay (2002,) eBay’s public relations manager Mary Lou Song fabricated that founding story in 1997 to interest the media.

Netflix supposedly stemmed when co-founder Reed Hastings racked up a $40 fine with a Blockbuster store for his overdue copy of the movie Apolo 13. Netflix co-founder Marc Randolph’s That Will Never Work: The Birth of Netflix and the Amazing Life of an Idea (2019) debunks that origin myth. Although Hastings’s $40 fine inspired the process, it wasn’t the single “spark of imagination” that cooked up Netflix.

YouTube supposedly began when founders Chad Hurley and Steve Chen could not share videos of a 2005 dinner party in Chen’s San Francisco apartment. Everybody accepted the story until it was refuted by the third co-founder, Jawed Karim (who had been sidelined by Hurley and Chen.) Karim produced a prototype of YouTube inspired by HOTorNOT, a dating site that nudged users to upload photos and others to rate the looks of potential companions. Karim was particularly inspired by the concept of user-generated content versus website owners supplying the content. He set out to make a version of HOTorNOT with video. Chen later admitted that he embellished the dinner party story, which was “probably very strengthened by marketing ideas around creating a story that was very digestible.”

Facebook, first called FaceMash, was also inspired by HOTorNOT. Mark Zuckerberg and his dorm buddies created a website to post pairs of pictures from Harvard’s student community, asking users to rate the “hotter” individual.

Many Good Founding Stories are Just That—They’re Good Stories.

No company is ever founded in a single moment. Ideas evolve after assimilation and experimentation over several months, even years. It’s less interesting to say that things just develop, one idea building upon another. You won’t get as much publicity for rendering a normal-but-boring founding story.

If these mythic creation stories prove anything, it’s that people prefer a good story. People like a storyteller who’s more articulate than one who is accurate. Good stories move. Good stories lead audiences on a journey of the imagination.

Telling a Good Story is a Rehearsed Performance

Human beings are not transformed as much by statistics and facts as we are by stories. In All Marketers are Liars—The Power of Telling Authentic Stories in a Low-trust World (2005,) marketing guru Seth Godin says successful marketers don’t discuss features or benefits. They tell stories. Stories that readers want to read. And believe.

If humans were rational, we’d make judgments based on facts and statistics. But we’re not rational; we’re more convinced to act on stories, especially with emotional content. So the ability to tell a story well is a beneficial tool to add to your toolkit.

Idea for Impact: Those who can create and tell entertaining and exciting stories will have a marked advantage over others regarding persuasion. Learn to tell clear, commanding stories that make a good metaphor. Stories that appeal to emotion. Stories that relate. Stories that hold people’s attention. Stories that travel fast.

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Filed Under: Effective Communication, Mental Models, Sharpening Your Skills Tagged With: Communication, Entrepreneurs, Likeability, Negotiation, Persuasion, Presentations, Psychology

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About: Nagesh Belludi [hire] is a St. Petersburg, Florida-based freethinker, investor, and leadership coach. He specializes in helping executives and companies ensure that the overall quality of their decision-making benefits isn’t compromised by a lack of a big-picture understanding.

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