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Assertiveness

What Your Exhaustion May Be Telling You

March 1, 2025 By Nagesh Belludi Leave a Comment

Exhaustion Warning Signs: The Impact of Unclear Boundaries and Overcommitment Feeling completely drained, like you’ve been running on empty forever? Ask yourself a couple of key questions: Are you taking care of yourself? Are you setting healthy limits?

If exhaustion’s creeping up on you, chances are you haven’t been clear about what’s cool and what’s not. Maybe you’re saying “yes” way too much.

Not setting boundaries? That’s a one-way ticket to burnout town, stuck in an endless loop of feeling wiped out.

Remember, setting boundaries means not being afraid to say “no” when you need to, being okay with disappointing others sometimes, and making your limits crystal clear. Take time for yourself and stick to your routines. Boundaries lay down the law, stop you from going overboard, and give you the power to prioritize yourself.

Idea for Impact: Setting boundaries is an act of self-love and courage. It involves openly declaring what you will or won’t accept in your life. Though challenging, establishing boundaries can ultimately recharge you and add some zest back into your life.

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  5. Pulling Off the Impossible Under Immense Pressure: Leadership Lessons from Captain Sully

Filed Under: Health and Well-being, Living the Good Life, Sharpening Your Skills Tagged With: Assertiveness, Balance, Conflict, Mindfulness, Stress

When Giving Up Can Be Good for You

February 26, 2025 By Nagesh Belludi Leave a Comment

The Power of Quitting: When Giving Up Can Be Good for You We’ve all been trapped in the endless loop of boring books, pointless classes, toxic jobs, and unfulfilling relationships. While quitting might have a bad rap in some cultures—it’s seen as a sign of weakness—it can actually be the smartest move you make. No one wants to wear the “quitter” badge, but sometimes hard-headed perseverance isn’t the way to go. Clinging to a lost cause can drain your energy and leave you feeling stuck.

If what you’re doing still sparks joy, then keep at it. However, if you consistently feel drained and defeated, it may be time to pivot and pursue something new. Be honest with yourself: are you holding on to a lost cause simply because it’s easier than embracing a new challenge?

Quitting doesn’t mean giving up; it means making room for goals that truly ignite your passion.

Idea for Impact: Don’t waste your energy on dead ends. Instead, find satisfaction by pursuing paths that truly align with your interests and talents.

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Filed Under: Health and Well-being, Living the Good Life, Mental Models Tagged With: Assertiveness, Attitudes, Discipline, Mindfulness, Motivation, Negotiation, Procrastination, Simple Living

Why Are There No ‘How to Be a Great Follower’ Classes?

February 24, 2025 By Nagesh Belludi Leave a Comment

Why Are There No 'How to Be a Great Follower' Classes? It struck me recently: while we obsess over leadership—how to be a good leader, how to measure it, and so on—there’s barely a peep about being a good follower.

No one seems particularly interested in becoming a good follower. Step into a business school, and the hustle to prove leadership skills is as intense as caffeine consumption!

Think about it: leaders wouldn’t exist without followers. Both roles are vital for any group’s success.

Yet, leadership gets all the glory, while followership is often overlooked. Society praises leaders with power and prestige, while followers are seen as mere support staff. It’s as if followership is considered a less glamorous, passive role.

'The Art of Followership' by Ronald E. Riggio (ISBN 0787996653) So why the lack of buzz about following? Maybe there’s no market for it. But effective followership is just as vital. A bit more focus on it could lead to smoother, more balanced teams. After all, if everyone’s busy leading, who’s left to follow? Good leaders aren’t always out front.

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Filed Under: Leadership, Leading Teams, Managing People Tagged With: Assertiveness, Getting Along, Leadership, Personality, Persuasion

The One Person You Deserve to Cherish

January 25, 2025 By Nagesh Belludi Leave a Comment

The One Person You Deserve to Cherish You’d never dream of hurting the ones you love, so why treat yourself like an exception? You’re someone’s loved one, too. You deserve the same kindness you so freely give others.

  • Treat yourself with care. If you wouldn’t hurt someone you love, don’t do it to yourself.
  • Stop the self-criticism. When you’re harsh on yourself, remember you’d never say those things to a loved one.
  • Own your whole self. Embrace your flaws, your complexity, your mess. Live boldly, unapologetically.

Let go of the negativity. Build your confidence. Live freely, as your true self.

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Filed Under: Health and Well-being, Living the Good Life, Managing People Tagged With: Assertiveness, Attitudes, Balance, Conflict, Discipline, Mindfulness, Motivation

Escape the People-Pleasing Trap

December 23, 2024 By Nagesh Belludi Leave a Comment

Escape the People-Pleasing Trap You may believe that being kind, gentle, and agreeable will earn you love and acceptance. However, doing things for others that they should handle themselves only sets you up for disappointment. Ignoring clear violations of your boundaries and agreeing to commitments you’d rather decline only makes things worse. When you take on others’ frustrations and make their feelings your problem, you add to your own burdens.

Being a people-pleaser, under the illusion that it will win you affection, leads to a harmful cycle of neglecting your own essential needs. This flawed mindset fosters deep feelings of disrespect and disconnection from yourself. You endure constant invalidation based on how others treat you, making them dependent on you. Your relentless efforts to please will never be enough.

Idea for Impact: Shift your attitude. Elevate your self-respect. Take charge of your life. Prioritize your own needs. Don’t hesitate to say “no.” You deserve the same love and respect you freely give to others.

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  5. The High Cost of Winning a Small Argument

Filed Under: Living the Good Life, Mental Models Tagged With: Assertiveness, Conflict, Conversations, Getting Along, Likeability, Persuasion, Relationships, Stress, Time Management

How to … Escape the Overthinking Trap

October 28, 2024 By Nagesh Belludi Leave a Comment

Escape the Overthinking Trap: Shift Focus, Let Go, and Cultivate Resilience Spending too much time trapped in your own head, especially when those thoughts are critical or judgmental, can take a serious toll on your emotional health. This is particularly true when you’re stuck replaying unwanted memories or negative experiences. We often give our thoughts more weight than they deserve, and rarely do we see ourselves with the clear-eyed objectivity needed.

When you feel overwhelmed by these thoughts, break the cycle by redirecting your focus to a different activity or line of thinking. It’s important to remember that rumination isn’t the same as problem-solving or planning—it’s unproductive dwelling.

One effective strategy is to set aside a specific time to address your concerns. Give yourself a set window to think things through. You’ll often find that you either run out of things to worry about before the time is up or make progress, even if it’s just a small step forward. This “worry time” helps prevent rumination from creeping in throughout the day, allowing you to stay on track with other tasks.

Another tip is to write down your thoughts instead of letting them spiral inside your head. Constant self-criticism is counterproductive and only deepens the problem. Jot down a brief summary of what’s on your mind. Remember, many issues tend to work themselves out with time or lose their importance altogether. Talking to someone else can also help you gain a fresh perspective.

Idea for Impact: Focusing too much on yourself can set impossible expectations and lead to frustration. Instead of worrying about things you can’t control, shift your energy toward what you can influence, and let the rest go. Resilience—the ability to bounce back from setbacks—is one of the key traits that distinguishes successful people from the rest.

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Filed Under: Mental Models, Sharpening Your Skills Tagged With: Assertiveness, Biases, Confidence, Critical Thinking, Decision-Making, Perfectionism, Risk

What Knowledge Workers Want Most: Management-by-Exception

September 23, 2024 By Nagesh Belludi Leave a Comment

What Knowledge Workers Want Most: Management-by-Exception Peter Drucker called them ‘knowledge workers.’ These professionals possess specialized skills, are inherently driven, thrive on challenges, and require a high degree of independence to convert raw data and ideas into valuable knowledge.

What distinguishes knowledge workers is their strong desire for autonomy and the freedom to confront complex problems head-on. Their brilliance truly shines when they maintain control over their work processes and decision-making.

Micromanagement? That’s a non-starter for knowledge workers. Their productivity soars when they’re entrusted with the essential tools, authority, and the room they need to carry out their tasks.

Above all, what truly fuels the passion of knowledge workers is a compelling vision of the future that drives them to be active contributors. By nurturing intrapreneurship and providing opportunities to experiment with innovative ideas and calculated risks, managers can unlock their full potential.

Through the management-by-exception approach, managers only need to step in when they notice a significant misalignment with organizational priorities or when results start to falter, striking the perfect balance between guidance and autonomy.

Idea for Impact: Don’t apply traditional management methods to knowledge workers.

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Filed Under: Leading Teams, Managing People Tagged With: Assertiveness, Coaching, Delegation, Feedback, Great Manager, Mentoring, Persuasion, Peter Drucker

Ready to Pay Forward the Future You?

August 30, 2024 By Nagesh Belludi Leave a Comment

Pay Forward the Future You - Delay Gratification My fitness coach always kicks off each session with, “Are you ready to do the hard things now and pay forward the man you’ll become?” It’s his way of reminding me that every day is a chance to invest in my future self.

Healthy eating and regular training pay off slowly, so it’s easy to lose motivation. Unlike quick fixes, long-term goals need patience and delayed gratification, which can be tough. It’s tempting to slack off when there are no immediate consequences.

Idea for Impact: Visualize success. Imagine how amazing you’ll feel in the future. Stick to the plan.

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  4. Be Kind … To Yourself
  5. I’ll Be Happy When …

Filed Under: Health and Well-being, Living the Good Life Tagged With: Assertiveness, Attitudes, Discipline, Mindfulness, Motivation

Let Others Shine

August 28, 2024 By Nagesh Belludi Leave a Comment

Let Others Shine Got a brilliant idea? Share it freely and let others get in on the action.

Let them win. Let them look good.

Let them steal the spotlight and snag some of the credit.

Let everyone get a piece of the glory and bask in the collective success.

You’ll be amazed at how quickly things get done.

You’ll create a culture of collaboration that drives even greater achievements.

Idea for Impact: Help others win—when they shine, your own star rises faster.

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Filed Under: Leading Teams, Managing People Tagged With: Assertiveness, Getting Ahead, Networking, Social Dynamics, Social Skills, Teams, Workplace

The ‘What-the-Hell’ Effect: How Minor Slip-Ups Trigger a Cycle of Giving Up

August 8, 2024 By Nagesh Belludi Leave a Comment

The What-the-Hell Effect: How Minor Slip-Ups Trigger a Cycle of Giving Up Sticking to goals can be challenging, and it’s easy to give up. Researchers use the term “What-the-Hell Effect” to describe how a minor slip-up—like skipping a workout after committing to daily exercise—can trigger a larger compromise. You might think, “I’ve already missed one workout, so I might as well skip the rest of the week.” This mindset often leads to abandoning the goal entirely.

A small lapse can trigger the belief that further deviation is acceptable, causing a pattern of greater indulgence or negative behavior due to a sense of hopelessness and loss of control. This cycle reinforces the negative behavior, making it difficult to stay on track.

Idea for Impact: Understand how the “What-the-Hell Effect” triggers a cycle of setbacks and develop strategies to maintain self-control. Since setbacks are inevitable, planning for them can help prevent minor issues from derailing your progress entirely.

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Filed Under: Mental Models, Sharpening Your Skills Tagged With: Assertiveness, Discipline, Getting Things Done, Goals, Procrastination, Targets

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About: Nagesh Belludi [hire] is a St. Petersburg, Florida-based freethinker, investor, and leadership coach. He specializes in helping executives and companies ensure that the overall quality of their decision-making benefits isn’t compromised by a lack of a big-picture understanding.

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Unless otherwise stated in the individual document, the works above are © Nagesh Belludi under a Creative Commons BY-NC-ND license. You may quote, copy and share them freely, as long as you link back to RightAttitudes.com, don't make money with them, and don't modify the content. Enjoy!