We’ve all witnessed moments where someone verbally attacks another person. Comments like “You silly goose!” “You self-centered fool!” or “You ungrateful jerk!” are not only harsh and abusive, but they also quickly erode the attacker’s self-respect. Thankfully, most of us think, “I’d never speak to anyone like that.” We recognize the importance of respecting someone’s dignity and self-esteem.
However, we sometimes find that while we wouldn’t use such harsh language towards others, we have no problem directing similar vitriol at ourselves. We catch ourselves saying things like, “I’m such an idiot!” “I’m a real jerk!” or “I can be a little dim-witted!”
In other words, although we wouldn’t treat others with such cruelty, we mistakenly believe it’s acceptable to speak to ourselves that way. This phenomenon, known as “self-tyranny,” involves adopting authoritarian tendencies toward ourselves, leading to self-directed oppression. It’s simply despicable.
The significance is clear-cut: if you tend to criticize or demean yourself in such harsh terms, it’s time for a personal psychological rethink. You should treat yourself with the same respect and kindness you offer to others.
- Beware Extreme Self-Control: Rigidly controlling your own behavior and thoughts can lead to self-oppression.
- Avoid Overly Strict Ideals: Imposing harsh, uncompromising standards on yourself mirrors the absolutism of fascist ideology and can lead to a rigid adherence to personal ideals.
- Watch for Intense Self-Surveillance: Constantly monitoring and judging yourself with excessive severity resembles the surveillance state in oppressive regimes. Ditch that authoritarian approach to self-management.
Think well, act well, and treat yourself well!
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