Right Attitudes

Ideas for Impact

Sharpening Your Skills

Use Friction to Make or Break Habits

By Leave a Comment

It’s human nature to rely more on environmental triggers than we think. As a result, you’re more inclined to achieve a goal if you reduce any possible friction—i.e., eliminate obstacles that could make it harder for you to reach your goal.

One powerful method to tweak your environment to change behavior is the “hit the ground running” mindset. For instance, to start a morning exercise habit, reduce the friction of getting dressed for a workout by sleeping in your workout attire. Put your shoes and socks by the bed. On wintry days, set your jacket on the countertop by your keys.

Idea for Impact: Control your environment; change your habits

Don’t depend on trying to stay motivated to change behavior. Motivation can waver from one minute to the next. Reduce any potential friction in getting stuff done.

Equally, increase the friction for things you should avoid—e.g., break a bad habit by making it more inconvenient.

Wondering what to read next?

  1. 5 Minutes to Greater Productivity [Two-Minute Mentor #11]
  2. Intentions, Not Resolutions
  3. Do You Really Need More Willpower?
  4. Use This Trick to Make Daily Habits Stick This Year
  5. How to Turn Your Procrastination Time into Productive Time

Your time is far from being wasted!

By Leave a Comment

You’re not just idly passing the hours. Absolutely not!

Every single moment that has brought you to this point has been a skilled artist, shaping and refining you into the extraordinary individual you are today.

Think of it as a magnificent preparation, a strong base upon which the most incredible experiences will soon unfold.

These moments are like booming speakers turned up to the max, magnifying the brilliance that awaits you.

Don’t worry, because all time spent, even in moments of rest and recovery, is not a futile pursuit. On the contrary, it is an absolute necessity, a secret ingredient that adds flavor to the delightful feast that lies ahead. Embrace the journey.

Wondering what to read next?

  1. Howard Gardner’s Five Minds for the Future // Books in Brief
  2. This is Yoga for the Brain: Multidisciplinary Learning
  3. Four Ideas for Business Improvement Ideas
  4. Wide Minds, Bright Ideas: Book Summary of ‘Range: Why Generalists Triumph’ by David Epstein
  5. How to Stimulate Group Creativity // Book Summary of Edward de Bono’s ‘Six Thinking Hats’

Think Before You Commit: Say ‘Yes’ Slowly

By Leave a Comment

When presented with a request, avoid hastily agreeing and later regretting it. Instead, use this simple hack to prevent impulsive commitments: slow the conversation by posing questions.

Seek clarification regarding the specifics, time frame, and whether others have been approached. If you can only manage a portion of the task, inquire where your involvement would be most beneficial.

These questions allow you to gather more information and organize your thoughts. They will compel you to reconsider before biting off more than you can chew.

Undoing a default ‘yes’ is considerably more challenging than refraining from giving one initially. Revoking your commitment may result in even greater disappointment for the other person.

Idea for Impact: It’s tempting to say ‘yes’ to every demand imposed upon us by others. However, it is essential to reserve your ‘yes’for the right things. Respond with a deliberate and thoughtful ‘yes.’ Remember, every ‘no’ signifies a ‘yes’to something significant.

Wondering what to read next?

  1. Never Take the First Offer
  2. What Most People Get Wrong About Focus
  3. Here’s a Tactic to Sell Change: As a Natural Progression
  4. Buy Yourself Time
  5. This Manager’s Change Initiatives Lacked Ethos, Pathos, Logos: Case Study on Aristotle’s Persuasion Framework

How to … Strengthen The ‘Asking Muscle’

By Leave a Comment

Many people are afraid to ask—even negotiate—for what they want. Just because you ask for something doesn’t mean you’ll get it, but you must keep trying. In the same way that your body’s muscles need regular exercise to stay strong and flexible, the voices in your head do too. The more you practice asking (rehearse with a friend if needed,) the more comfortable it becomes.

Idea for Impact: Don’t wait for good things, as you may have been taught. Ask for what you want. With each triumph, you’ll gain confidence; with each disappointment, you’ll learn something. You’ll overcome the dread of asking for too much. You’ll conquer the fear of rejection or reprisal. Besides, you’ll be less deprived of what you’re reasonably entitled to.

Wondering what to read next?

  1. How to Turn Your Fears into Fuel
  2. Everything in Life Has an Opportunity Cost
  3. You’ll Never Get a ‘Yes’ If You Never Ask
  4. Here’s a Tactic to Sell Change: As a Natural Progression
  5. This Manager’s Change Initiatives Lacked Ethos, Pathos, Logos: Case Study on Aristotle’s Persuasion Framework

How to Speak Up in Meetings and Disagree Tactfully

By Leave a Comment

If you find it challenging to speak up in meetings, especially when disagreeing, here’s a helpful framework:

  1. Restate the objective, even if it seems obvious: “Let’s clarify what we aim to achieve here…” This restatement sharpens the focus on the purpose.
  2. Paraphrase someone’s point: “So, if I understand correctly, you’re suggesting…”
  3. Express your concerns or alternative perspective: “I have concerns because…” or “While I see your point, how would we address…”
  4. Be the last to contribute: Your silence piques curiosity and makes your statement more impactful. Incorporate the best ideas expressed and avoid obvious mistakes.

Following this approach, you can tactfully express your thoughts with the right tone and words while seeking common ground.

Wondering what to read next?

  1. How to Be Better in a Relationship: Assume Positive Intent
  2. The Sensitivity of Politics in Today’s Contentious Climate
  3. Entitlement and Anger Go Together
  4. Who Told You That Everybody Was Going to Like You?
  5. Let Go of Toxic Friendships

Avoid Trigger Words: Own Your Words with Grace and Care

By Leave a Comment

Using phrases like “you should,” “you never,” and “you’re supposed to” can immediately put the other person on the defensive.

  • When making statements, it’s better to begin with “I feel” or “I’d like.” By using “I” statements, nobody can argue with the fact that you feel a certain way.
  • Take responsibility for your words. Instead of protesting with phrases like “Don’t be late as usual,” which only reinforce complaints, try inviting positive change by saying, “It would be helpful for me if you could arrive early tonight, maybe by six.”
  • Saying “I don’t care” or “You choose” might not make you seem pleasant and agreeable. The other person may resent being forced to make decisions on your behalf.
  • Phrases like “I hate to be a pain, but…” or “I could be wrong, but…” undermine your request before you even make it.
  • Saying “I know” can make you appear irritating, self-important, or unreceptive. Instead, using “You’re right” doesn’t belittle something the other person may have just realized. “Yes, that’s on my mind!” acknowledges the other person’s reminder.
  • If someone apologizes anxiously, don’t say, “Stop saying sorry.” Instead, saying, “You have nothing to apologize for,” is more reassuring and won’t make the other person feel awkward.

Idea for Impact: Using direct and concise language strengthens the message and clarifies your needs. Be mindful of language that may unintentionally cause offense, distress, or discomfort to others. Prioritizing empathy and open-mindedness can contribute to maintaining respectful and inclusive conversations.

Wondering what to read next?

  1. Avoid Control Talk
  2. “But, Excuse Me, I’m Type A”: The Ultimate Humblebrag?
  3. I Told You So
  4. “Are We Fixing, Whinging, or Distracting?”
  5. Here’s How to Improve Your Conversational Skills

External Blame is the Best Defense of the Insecure

By Leave a Comment

In the realm of excuses, accountability tends to retreat while blame takes center stage. You find yourself playing the “blame game,” swiftly shifting responsibility onto external factors to protect your ego.

When faced with challenges, it’s natural to become defensive and deflect responsibility onto your boss, a vendor, the weather, working conditions, a partner, economic downturns, or anything but yourself. However, this negative energy worsens the situation and weakens your self-perception.

Beneath the surface, though, lies a truth: externalizing blame always hinders real growth and progress. So, the next time you catch yourself falling into the trap of feeling like a prisoner of circumstances, making excuses, or pointing fingers at others, take a moment to pause and ask yourself, “What could I have done to prevent this problem?” and “What lessons can we derive from this situation?”

Idea for Impact: Assuming responsibility is a testament to your strength. It displays courage, even if it may not feel that way. Only the resilient can truly accept blame. When we externalize blame, we give up control and surrender our power to heal and improve ourselves. On the other hand, embracing accountability has numerous benefits: it strengthens relationships, enhances credibility, fosters happiness within yourself and others, promotes transparency, boosts self-esteem, facilitates learning, and ultimately helps resolve problems. Choose accountability over blame and pave the way for personal growth and success.

Wondering what to read next?

  1. How to … Change Your Life When Nothing Seems to be Going Your Way
  2. Cope with Anxiety and Stop Obsessive Worrying by Creating a Worry Box
  3. Expressive Writing Can Help You Heal
  4. This May Be the Most Potent Cure for Melancholy
  5. Don’t Be So Hard on Yourself

“Are We Fixing, Whinging, or Distracting?”

By Leave a Comment

When a friend is upset and seeks your support, it’s essential to ask them a simple question once it’s appropriate: “Do you want to talk about it? Do you want to get your mind off it and distract yourself, or are you expecting me to give you some suggestions to help you out?”

Asking, “Are we fixing, whinging, or distracting?” can be incredibly beneficial for an upset friend. I use it often, and people respond positively to it. This question establishes boundaries and fosters trust, allowing you to be there for them the way they need.

Sometimes, people simply need to vent. Begin by providing comfort and then follow up with, “Do you want advice, or do you want me just to listen?”

It’s crucial to validate the other person’s feelings and experiences. Even if you believe there’s an easy fix, prioritize acknowledging their emotions. Let them be heard and empathize with them. Validating their emotions is truly significant. Simple statements like “Yeah, that IS terrible,” “That does suck,” “I can definitely see why you’re angry,” or “You have a right to be frustrated” can work wonders in offering solace and emotional support during challenging moments.

At times, staying quiet is what’s needed. It saves you from saying something unsuited to the situation. You can also say, “I am at a loss for words,” which is still validating. It shows that you consider the issue as crucial as they do and are also genuinely stumped by it.

However, on other occasions, they may need to share their experiences with someone outside of the conflict. This allows them to express their thoughts and emotions, which can be cathartic and aid in processing their experiences. If they wish to shift their focus and be distracted from what’s bothering them, talk about your own day, share something funny you came across, or engage in a fun activity together.

Idea for Impact: Don’t assume they’re seeking a solution when someone vents. Avoid offering advice right away in an attempt to steer them away from discussing it.

People often want to vent, grumble, and unload their troubles, even momentarily. Listen patiently and without reproach, offering a compassionate ear.

Wondering what to read next?

  1. Avoid Trigger Words: Own Your Words with Grace and Care
  2. Avoid Control Talk
  3. I Told You So
  4. Witty Comebacks and Smart Responses for Nosy People
  5. Here’s How to Improve Your Conversational Skills

The Emotional Edge: Elevating Your Marketing Messaging

By Leave a Comment

The Emotional Edge: Elevating Your Marketing Messaging

Messaging isn’t only about the product.

It isn’t solely about the problem.

It isn’t even just about the consequences of not solving that problem.

It’s about the emotional pain that you alleviate.

Good marketers highlight the benefits, value, or solutions that their product or service can offer. The best marketers often leverage emotional triggers to establish a deeper connection with consumers.

Wondering what to read next?

  1. Make ‘Em Thirsty
  2. Creativity & Innovation: The Opportunities in Customer Pain Points
  3. Your Product May Be Excellent, But Is There A Market For It?
  4. Constraints Inspire Creativity: How IKEA Started the “Flatpack Revolution”
  5. How to Create Emotional Connections with Your Customers

The Enron Scandal: A Lesson on Motivated Blindness

By Leave a Comment

The fallout from the Enron fiasco had far-reaching effects on the economy and the public’s trust in corporations. It serves as a powerful lesson in the dangers of motivated blindness—when individuals have a personal stake in unethical actions, they often look the other way or find ways to rationalize their behavior.

The folks at Arthur Andersen, serving as Enron’s external auditor, found themselves in a precarious situation. On the one hand, they were supposed to ensure financial integrity, but on the other hand, they acted as consultants, aiding Enron in manipulating financial transactions to deceive investors and manipulate earnings. Enron generously poured hefty fees their way, with auditing fees exceeding $25 million and consulting fees reaching $27 million in 2001. So, why would they want to put an end to this lucrative gravy train? To complicate matters further, many auditors from Andersen were eagerly vying for coveted positions at Enron, just like their fortunate colleagues.

To combat motivated blindness, it’s crucial to reflect on our biases, hold ourselves accountable, and actively seek out diverse perspectives to gain a broader understanding of any given issue. Max Bazerman, a professor at Harvard Business School and author of The Power of Noticing: What the Best Leaders See (2014,) asserts that individuals can overcome their inclination to overlook vital clues by fostering a “noticing mindset.” This involves consistently asking oneself and others, both within and outside the organization, the question: “Which critical threats and challenges might we be neglecting?”

Wondering what to read next?

  1. Power Inspires Hypocrisy
  2. Why Groups Cheat: Complicity and Collusion
  3. The Poolguard Phenomenon
  4. Power Corrupts, and Power Attracts the Corruptible
  5. The Ethics Test