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Thou Shall Attend the Office Holiday Party

December 4, 2010 By Nagesh Belludi Leave a Comment

Attend the office holiday party The office holiday party may seem like a mandatory celebration. Perhaps it is not in your tradition to celebrate Christmas. May be you are introversive, do not enjoy partying, or you feel uneasy about being around many unfamiliar people. You might even dread interacting with coworkers who you are not immensely fond of.

Despite your reluctance, the office holiday party comes with an implied obligation to attend it and enjoy it. Generally, companies consider the holiday party as a morale- and camaraderie-building occasion, not just as a mere ritual. Therefore, your management will take notice if you do not attend and may deem you negligent or arrogant if you ignore the office holiday party.

Unless you have a perfectly compelling reason—not an excuse—not to, you should partake in this celebration. It pays to attend the office holiday party, attempt to like it, exchange gifts, and make the most of it.

Great Opportunity to be “Seen”

As you move up the corporate ladder, one vital skill for your success is to be on familiar terms with the influential managers in your organization. The art of forming coalitions and winning the support is more about “who knows you” and “what they know about you” than about “who you know.” The most effective way of earning this recognition is showing up where the action is, “being there” and acting the part. For this very reason, the office holiday party is a great networking opportunity for you to introduce yourself to peers and management with whom you would not normally interact.

Office Holiday Party Etiquette

  • Attend and enjoy the office holiday party A word on propriety for the organizers: do not call the holiday party a “Christmas Party” and alienate employees who may not celebrate Christmas. The term “holiday party” is more inclusive.
  • Attend the party. Do not arrive too late or leave too early. You need not stay for the length of the party.
  • The holiday party is not a social occasion. Even if the party has a festive theme and setting, it is still in the professional context. Dress appropriately and conduct yourself professionally. Do not eat excessively or get drunk. Do not pass judgment, exchange inappropriate comments and jokes, or deride other guests.
  • Be Seen. Do not spend all your time hanging around familiar people. Mingle and introduce yourself to as many other guests as you can. Make sure you are “seen” by everybody important. Attempt to enjoy the party and make the most of it.
  • Bring a thoughtful and practical gift for the gift exchange ritual. Stay within the prescribed guidelines for buying gifts.
  • See my articles on how to start a conversation, how to help people pursue a conversation, how to introduce people to one another, and how to remember names.

The Winning Idea: Attend and enjoy the office party

Professional visibility and career success is often about fitting in and being visible to the influential managers and peers. Unless you have a perfectly compelling reason not to, you should partake in the office holiday party. Consider it a career advancement exercise, mingle with everybody, and enjoy it.

Wondering what to read next?

  1. Office Chitchat Isn’t Necessarily a Time Waster
  2. Holiday Party Etiquette During the COVID-19 Pandemic
  3. What to Do When an Invitation Says “No Gifts”
  4. How to Reduce Thanksgiving Stress
  5. Could Limiting Social Media Reduce Your Anxiety About Work?

Filed Under: Career Development, Ideas and Insights Tagged With: Networking, Social Life, Work-Life

Three Great Commencement Speeches by Steve Jobs, Bill Gates, and J.K. Rowling

May 4, 2010 By Nagesh Belludi 9 Comments

The commencement season is upon us. On these momentous occasions, students celebrate their academic achievements and prepare to transit from one pivotal life experience to another.

In graduation speeches, students hear reflections of personal stories and timeless advice from accomplished individuals. While commencement speeches are brimming with plenty of patently obvious advice such as “pursue whatever you do with passion,” speeches such as the ones featured below are truly motivating.

I have coached many students graduating this year and I have recognized that, despite a gloomy job market and other challenges ahead, this year’s graduating classes seem to be more optimistic than previous classes with which I have interacted. My very best to them.

Steve Jobs: “Don’t waste your time living someone else’s life”

Steve Jobs, Commencement Speech at Stanford | June 12, 2005 Steve Jobs cofounded Apple Computer Inc. at age 21 in 1976, got fired in 1985, and returned in 1997 to lead one of the most remarkable corporate turnarounds in business history. The product and marketing visions he has since executed have elevated him to the status of a business and media superstar. Steve Jobs had a cancerous pancreatic tumor removed in 2004 and underwent a liver transplant in 2009.

In his 2005 commencement address (transcript, video) at Stanford University, Steve Jobs urged graduates to pursue their dreams and fulfill the opportunities in life’s setbacks:

  • Sometimes life hits you in the head with a brick. Don’t lose faith. I’m convinced that the only thing that kept me going was that I loved what I did. You’ve got to find what you love. … Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven’t found it yet, keep looking. Don’t settle. As with all matters of the heart, you’ll know when you find it.
  • Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma – which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of other’s opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.

Bill Gates: “Address the world’s deepest inequities”

Bill Gates, Commencement Speech at Harvard | June 7, 2007 Bill Gates, the co-founder of Microsoft and Corbis, is currently the world’s most influential philanthropist. His Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation has donated billions of dollars to world health causes, particularly toward the eradication of infectious diseases.

In his 2007 commencement address (transcript, video) at Harvard University, Bill Gates urged graduates to discover and help solve the health and social inequalities that the world faces:

  • I left Harvard with no real awareness of the awful inequities in the world—the appalling disparities of health, and wealth, and opportunity that condemn millions of people to lives of despair. … Humanity’s greatest advances are not in its discoveries—but in how those discoveries are applied to reduce inequity. Whether through democracy, strong public education, quality health care, or broad economic opportunity—reducing inequity is the highest human achievement.
  • If you believe that every life has equal value, it’s revolting to learn that some lives are seen as worth saving and others are not. … I hope you will come back here to Harvard 30 years from now and reflect on what you have done with your talent and your energy. I hope you will judge yourselves not on your professional accomplishments alone, but also on how well you have addressed the world’s deepest inequities … on how well you treated people a world away who have nothing in common with you but their humanity.

J.K. Rowling: “The benefits of failure”

J K Rowling, Commencement Speech at Harvard | June 5, 2008 J.K. Rowling, the celebrated author of the Harry Potter series of fantasy novels, is a classic “rags to riches” life success story. At the age of 28, as a depressed, unemployed single mother who lived on welfare, J.K. Rowling started writing the first Harry Potter book at a café. Within five years, thanks to the success of Harry Potter, she rose from obscurity to literary prominence and became a billionaire.

In her 2008 commencement address (transcript, video) at Harvard University, J.K. Rowling urges graduates to persist through failures and despondency:

  • Failure meant a stripping away of the inessential. I stopped pretending to myself that I was anything other than what I was, and began to direct all my energy into finishing the only work that mattered to me. … Rock bottom became the solid foundation on which I rebuilt my life.
  • Failure gave me an inner security that I had never attained by passing examinations. Failure taught me things about myself that I could have learned no other way. I discovered that I had a strong will, and more discipline than I had suspected; I also found out that I had friends whose value was truly above the price of rubies.
  • The knowledge that you have emerged wiser and stronger from setbacks means that you are, ever after, secure in your ability to survive. You will never truly know yourself, or the strength of your relationships, until both have been tested by adversity.

Wondering what to read next?

  1. Let the Buddha Help You Appreciate the Role of Questions in Inquiry
  2. Does the Consensus Speak For You?
  3. Become a Smart, Restrained Communicator Like Benjamin Franklin
  4. Choose Your Role Models Carefully
  5. Transformational Leadership Lessons from Lee Kuan Yew, Singapore’s Founding Father

Filed Under: Great Personalities, Ideas and Insights Tagged With: Bill Gates, Steve Jobs, Wisdom

Links from Around the Web

June 26, 2009 By Nagesh Belludi Leave a Comment

  • Instructions for Life Instructions for Life. 43 quotes of wisdom and flashes of insight. My personal favorites: (1) When you say, “I’m sorry,” look the person in the eye. (2) Once a year, go someplace you’ve never been before. (3) Judge your success by what you had to give up in order to get it.
  • Ten Fatal Flaws that Derail Leaders. Often, leaders do not realize their mistakes or try to hide them rather than owning up to them. Effective leaders have the capability to spot their own mistakes, reflect on them and recognize how to correct them. Here is a list of ten obvious leadership lapses. Use this “to-avoid” list to assess your own performance and reflect on what you may need to do differently.
  • Finding Patience at Work. “Our lives at work are filled with difficulty. Patience requires that we fully and directly face our difficulties, that we embrace and learn from situations and from our feelings about them. Owning and transforming our pain and disappointment can be a tremendous challenge, as well as a tremendous gift.” Quote from “Z.B.A.: Zen of Business Administration,” Marc Lesser. Source: The Daily Dharma from Tricycle magazine
  • Holmes and Rahe Stress Scale. An easy and effective test to measure how recent life events could lead to stress and illness.
  • What Do You Tell Your Boss and When? Fortune magazine columnist Stanley Bing offers this quiz to help assess your communication style with your boss. My blog has previously discussed the importance of keeping your boss in line and suiting his preferred style of communication.
  • Compilation of the Funniest Résumé Mistakes. Amusing examples of vagaries, mistakes and overstretched qualifications on résumés of job applicants.

Filed Under: Ideas and Insights

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About: Nagesh Belludi [hire] is a St. Petersburg, Florida-based freethinker, investor, and leadership coach. He specializes in helping executives and companies ensure that the overall quality of their decision-making benefits isn’t compromised by a lack of a big-picture understanding.

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