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Persuasion

Books in Brief: “Hell Yeah or No” Mental Model

November 15, 2022 By Nagesh Belludi Leave a Comment

'Hell Yeah Or No' by Derek Sivers (ISBN 1988575060) American entrepreneur and blogger Derek Sivers popularized the “Hell Yeah or No” mental model (YouTube Synopsis): unless you’re super excited about something, don’t commit to it.

If you’re ready to say ‘yes’ to the things that aren’t that great, you won’t have time, energy, and focus for the “hell yeah” stuff in your life. Sivers has summed up,

We tend to say yes to too many things. And because of this, we’re spread too thin. We’re so busy doing average things that we don’t have time for the occasional great thing.

So instead I propose raising the bar as high as you can, so that if you’re feeling anything less than, “oh, hell yeah, that would be amazing,” then just say, no.

By doing this, you will miss out on many good things, but that’s okay because your time will be quite empty. So then by saying no to the merely good things, you’ll have the time and the energy and the space in your life to throw yourself in entirely when that occasional great thing comes up.

Recommendation: Read this insight-dense book. The “Hell Yeah or No” mental model will reframe how you control impulses and consider life’s big decisions.

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Filed Under: Mental Models, Sharpening Your Skills Tagged With: Assertiveness, Clutter, Decision-Making, Discipline, Negotiation, Persuasion, Wisdom

Lessons from the Japanese Decision-Making Process

November 10, 2022 By Nagesh Belludi Leave a Comment

Ringi Seido - Decision-Making Process in Japanese Management Systems Japanese firms traditionally use the ringi seido (“request for approval system”) to make critical decisions. A proposal is circulated to appropriate people, advancing from lower to higher ranks. As the proposal works through the management layers before landing at the top, each participant puts their stamp (the hanko) on the document.

This collective consensus process allows for a greater number of reasonable alternatives to be considered and for the risk to be spread. Although it may be slow, the implementation is faster once the decision is made. (Since the early ’90s, Toyota has followed a “three-stamp movement,” restricting the number of people needing to approve a proposal to three.)

Unlike consensus management in the west, the ringi system is often used to appease factions in an institution. Given the Japanese norms (nemawashi) of social structure and intercultural communication, everybody tends to be very diplomatic when giving an opinion. A decision isn’t made if unanimity isn’t reached.

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Filed Under: Business Stories, Effective Communication, Leading Teams Tagged With: Conflict, Critical Thinking, Japan, Meetings, Persuasion, Presentations, Teams, Thought Process

Never Take the First Offer

October 24, 2022 By Nagesh Belludi Leave a Comment

Never Take the First Offer in Negotiations Gently push back, at least for one round. Especially if you’re a less-aggressive personality type and are programmed to answer ‘yes’ to the first reasonable offer someone makes.

People seldom offer the best they can offer right away because the first offer “anchors” the negotiation. They risk “showing their cards” and divulging some bargaining zones.

If you don’t push back even once, you’ll wind up with a less-than-optimal deal. A straightforward question such as “Can you do better than that?” will help you fend off the first offer politely without being a pushover.

If the counterparty says ‘no’ and you feel you can sustain the process for another round, inquire, “I’d like your help to learn why the first offer is the best you can do.” The key to being a better negotiator isn’t simply presenting your demands but asking detailed questions designed to better understand the other side’s interests.

If their answers make no sense, share your confusion. Offer a strong counteroffer based on your ideal intended outcome and your appraisal of the counterparty’s options and their “reserve price.”

Idea for Impact: Beware of the trap of saying ‘yes’ too quickly. You’ll get farther with a bit of polite persistence than quick surrender.

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Filed Under: Effective Communication, Mental Models Tagged With: Assertiveness, Conflict, Decision-Making, Likeability, Negotiation, Persuasion, Social Skills

How You Make a Memorable Elevator Speech

September 29, 2022 By Nagesh Belludi Leave a Comment

How You Make a Memorable Elevator Speech With an elevator speech, you not only have a short time to elicit someone’s interest but also the added challenge of standing out from the crowd.

Your only goal should be to say something intriguing, memorable, and unique, prompting the prospect to lean in and invite, “Wait … do tell me more.”

I’ve listened to hundreds of elevator languages, and the few that continued out are the ones that sparked a conversation. Sameness and clichés are boring—everything sounds more or less the same. If, on the proverbial elevator, one must decide between ‘different’ or ‘better,’ one would choose ‘different.’ People remember ‘different.’

So, presenting yourself in the best possible light involves saying something snappy and ditching the details. Be concise and coherent, but not vague. Appear mysterious and confident, but not arrogant.

Idea for Impact: With an elevator speech, you’ll be forgotten if you aren’t unique and memorable. Rehearse your message well and be ready to perform it flawlessly at a moment’s notice.

P.S. My elevator speech: “Hi, My name’s Nagesh. I’m an investor. I’m just like Warren Buffett, except that I deal with a lot fewer zeros than him.”

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Filed Under: Effective Communication, Sharpening Your Skills Tagged With: Communication, Critical Thinking, Marketing, Meetings, Negotiation, Persuasion, Presentations, Skills for Success

How to … Prepare to Be Interviewed by The Media

September 26, 2022 By Nagesh Belludi Leave a Comment

How to Prepare to Be Interviewed by The Media

I’ve never stumbled upon a media guest who’s not been unhappy with the results of an on-camera interview. Most feel they looked nervous or uncertain, bumbled over their words or didn’t get across with clarity, or the interviewer focused on the wrong stuff.

  • Rehearse and practice. Prepare for your interview by dress-rehearsing through your talking points with a colleague. Record it, review the footage, and look at your articulation and body language. Do you appear calm, coherent, and confident?
  • Television draws attention to your posture, energy, and facial expression. Keep eye contact. Focus on the person asking the questions and not on the camera. The more your eyes move around, the less trustworthy you’ll appear. Align how you look with how you want to be perceived—dress in a dark suit to appear serious, roll your sleeves up to appear hard-working, and don a polo shirt if your message is fun and informal.
  • Know your message. Before the interview begins, decide on the three key points you want to get across and stick with them. Three is easy enough to remember. It’ll prevent you from getting caught up in the conversations in your head.
  • Figure out your story. Think through the essence of what it is you need to communicate. Get your facts straight. Think about what you are trying to get across and how you can make that story relevant and understandable to your audience.
  • Restrain yourself from thinking aloud. Keep your anecdotes short; don’t overestimate the fascination your audience will have with your personal life stories.
  • Avoid verbal fillers such as “um” and “ah” that can really hurt how you come across.
  • 'The Media Training Bible' by Brad Phillips (ISBN 0988322005) Allow yourself a second to collect your thoughts and structure your answer. Resist the temptation to think of additional details as you narrate the answer. You can provide a consistent and well-reasoned answer by sticking to the details and structure you had planned for. Be concise. Do not ramble on. Keep your soundbites short and your anecdotes simple.
  • Be prepared to be interrupted and sidetracked. If you have nothing to say about something, say nothing. Better still, if you know what you’ll be interviewed for, have something substantial to say about it and say it regardless of the questions you’re asked. Use transitional phrases such as “I think the real question is …,” “What’s important here is,” or “Let me draw attention to” and redirect the conversation if necessary.

If you’re in a position that requires you to speak to the media often, take a course or get a coach who can train you on becoming an effective spokesperson. An excellent resource is Media Training Bible (2012) by media trainer Brad Phillips.

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  3. Here’s a Tactic to Sell Change: As a Natural Progression
  4. Persuade Others to See Things Your Way: Use Aristotle’s Ethos, Logos, Pathos, and Timing
  5. This Manager’s Change Initiatives Lacked Ethos, Pathos, Logos: Case Study on Aristotle’s Persuasion Framework

Filed Under: Effective Communication, Sharpening Your Skills Tagged With: Assertiveness, Communication, Conflict, Crisis Management, Critical Thinking, Persuasion, Presentations

Making the Nuances Count in Decisions

September 19, 2022 By Nagesh Belludi Leave a Comment

Making the Nuances Count in Decisions Holding your tongue and withholding a definite opinion is often more prudent than being rapid-fire because the topic at hand may compel a bit of nuance.

These frazzled and frenzied times are the antitheses of active inquiry. No one pays attention. Not anymore. The open-ended conversation quickly devolves into spewing ill-considered opinions. Active inquiry and thoughtful dialog lose out.

No need to shoot your mouth off in response to negative emotional triggers. It’s okay to be ambivalent about some things. It’s good to be skeptical about what you think you know. That’s where the nuance begins.

Idea for Impact: Reality is often more nuanced than you may realize at the moment. Take the time to consume information more deliberately, allowing shades of meaning. Seek first to understand.

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Filed Under: Effective Communication, Managing People, Sharpening Your Skills Tagged With: Assertiveness, Conflict, Conversations, Critical Thinking, Getting Along, Persuasion, Social Skills

Why People are Afraid to Think

August 26, 2022 By Nagesh Belludi Leave a Comment


Men fear thought as they fear nothing else on earth—more than ruin, more even than death. Thought is subversive and revolutionary, destructive and terrible; thought is merciless to privilege, established institutions, and comfortable habits; thought is anarchic and lawless, indifferent to authority, careless of the well-tried wisdom of the ages. Thought looks into the pit of hell and is not afraid. (Bertrand Russell, Why Men Fight: A Method of Abolishing the International Duel (1916,) pp. 178–179)

Bertrand Russell on Why People are Afraid to Think Laziness and inability usually coerce people to reject thinking. But, as Russell contends, fear is a non-obvious inhibitor of thought. Not just because meticulous reasoning is demanding but because thinking may occasion an undermining—even revaluation—of our long-held convictions about all sorts of matters—notably religion and ethics.

People reject thinking because we fear it may challenge our equilibrium—how we make sense of the world. We’ll be coerced to see the world anew. As I’ve emphasized previously, once a belief is added to our corpus of viewpoints, we indulge in “intellectual censorship.” We cling to our ideas rather than objectively reassessing and questioning them.

Idea for Impact: Life should alter you. Through conscientious thinking, your worldview can—and should—reflect that growth.

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Filed Under: Mental Models, Sharpening Your Skills Tagged With: Bertrand Russell, Conviction, Critical Thinking, Persuasion, Philosophy, Thinking Tools, Wisdom

Competitive vs Cooperative Negotiation

August 24, 2022 By Nagesh Belludi Leave a Comment

'Bargaining for Advantage' by G. Richard Shell (ISBN 0143036971) Does a competitive person make a better negotiator than a cooperative person? Wharton professor G. Richard Shell’s insightful Bargaining for Advantage: Negotiation Strategies for Reasonable People (2006) contends there isn’t a straightforward answer.

Competitive people don’t mind interpersonal friction and thus initially have the upper hand over less aggressive personalities with little appetite for friction. However, competitive people generally lack skills in managing relationships, which gives cooperative people an advantage in situations where interpersonal trust over the long term is crucial. It’s easier to negotiate against someone who has a similar personality. Negotiation gets dicier when different personality types mix.

How to improve your results? Practice. Prepare through information-gathering and setting achievable but optimistic targets for the negotiation process.

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Filed Under: Effective Communication, Managing People Tagged With: Assertiveness, Conflict, Getting Along, Likeability, Negotiation, Persuasion

Listen and Involve

August 22, 2022 By Nagesh Belludi Leave a Comment

Participative Management Style All too often, leaders live in a culture of telling. They see their role as instructing others what to do, to plow through by compliance. But true leadership is eliciting commitment.

People want their thinking to count. If there’s a better way to carry out a task, they want to be able to identify it and put it into action. They’re more spurred to prevail at a challenge if they have a commitment to their work by their own volition. Hence, leaders should engage their people in choosing the goals the group needs to accomplish.

Idea for Impact: Leaders who play a participative management style derive enormous rewards in efficiency and work quality. Find opportunities to have direct conversations with individual employees and teams about what can be done to improve effectiveness.

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Filed Under: Leading Teams, Managing People Tagged With: Coaching, Feedback, Likeability, Persuasion, Workplace

The Loss Aversion Mental Model: A Case Study on Why People Think Spirit is a Horrible Airline

August 11, 2022 By Nagesh Belludi 1 Comment

Why People Think Spirit is a Horrible Airline---Loss Aversion Mental Model

When Spirit Airlines pivoted to competing on price in the late 2000s, it quickly gained a reputation not only for operational inefficiencies but also for its in-your-face, take-it-or-leave attitude towards customer service.

Where other airlines charged by-the-package fares for the flight experience, Spirit pared back service and introduced an a la carte pricing model. Charging for the “ancillaries”—i.e., everything optional, including water—allowed Spirit to keep ticket prices down and appeal to price-sensitive travelers willing to sacrifice the usual amenities for a lower ticket price.

In the ensuing years, the unconventionality of this business model did not go down well with customers. Much of the flying public’s frustration with Spirit had to do with Loss Aversion. That’s the notion that the emotional disappointment of a loss is more extreme than the joy of a comparable gain. If finding a cheaper fare on Spirit felt delightful, giving up some—or all—of the savings to purchase ancillaries and surrender the savings felt utterly miserable.

Passengers felt ripped off by these seemingly hidden fees, especially when the true cost of flying Spirit ended up greater than what the initial ticket price led them to believe.

Spirit 101---Spirit Airlines Perception Problem Spirit became quickly convinced that there was a perception problem—its customers didn’t fully understand how its fares work. Particularly, first-time customers blindly presumed that Spirit Airlines works the same way as other airlines. In reality, there were no hidden or excessive fees, and passengers could only pay for what they need or want. In 2014, the airline introduced its “Spirit 101” campaign to educate customers and alter their perceptions. With time and the increased adaptation of the “Basic Fare” model and curtailed customer service by every other airline, passengers’ expectations have since been right-sized. Spirit Airlines has come a long way, and its customer service has improved vastly.

Further studies on loss aversion have shown that a cascade of successive fees is worse than the cumulative: i.e., three ancillary fees that add up to, say, $70, feel a lot worse than a single $70 fee. Appropriately, Spirit offers a “Bundle it Combo” package.

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Filed Under: Business Stories, Mental Models Tagged With: Aviation, Biases, Customer Service, Decision-Making, Emotions, Entrepreneurs, Innovation, Marketing, Mental Models, Parables, Persuasion, Psychology, Strategy

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About: Nagesh Belludi [hire] is a St. Petersburg, Florida-based freethinker, investor, and leadership coach. He specializes in helping executives and companies ensure that the overall quality of their decision-making benefits isn’t compromised by a lack of a big-picture understanding.

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Unless otherwise stated in the individual document, the works above are © Nagesh Belludi under a Creative Commons BY-NC-ND license. You may quote, copy and share them freely, as long as you link back to RightAttitudes.com, don't make money with them, and don't modify the content. Enjoy!