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Living with Rules You Don’t Like

July 15, 2020 By Nagesh Belludi Leave a Comment

As a manager, sometimes you have to enforce rules that you don’t agree with.

Try your best to empathize with the rules, and if you can’t, you have no choice to accept the rules and implement them.

No manager wants to be the bearer of bad news, particularly when it’s about something the manager disagrees with. To avoid conflict with your employees, be concise, straightforward, and empathetic. Pass on the underlying principle communicated down to you. Then assert, “I’m afraid we have to live with this rule.”

Allow for venting, but discourage debate.

To maintain respect for those who have made the decisions, you may add, “Our executives have considered other options. They’ve made the choices based on what’s best for the organization. Decisions made at the top are often the final word on a subject. Rules are the rules. It’s okay to question them and not like them, but they still need to be followed.”

Emphasize that some disputes and disagreements are worth fighting, and others just aren’t. “I certainly don’t like it any more than you do. This isn’t the choice I would have made. But, let’s live with this rule, implement the change to the best of our abilities, and focus on our work and our team.”

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Filed Under: Leading Teams, Managing People Tagged With: Communication, Conflict, Persuasion, Social Skills, Teams

How to Project Positive Expectations

June 4, 2020 By Nagesh Belludi Leave a Comment

If you want to be seen as a doer, somebody who can be depended upon to get a job done, answer with “I will” whenever possible.

According to George Walther, author of Power Talking: 50 Ways to Say What You Mean & Get What You Want (1991,) expressions such as “I’ll try” make you seem hesitant—even ineffective.

Recall all the people who’ve promise to do something by saying, “I’ll try to get back to you tomorrow.” They rarely do. They have to be reminded, prodded, and nagged.

Those who announce, “I’ll have an answer for you by two this afternoon,” typically follow through.

Idea for Impact: Watch Your Language

Your choice of words matters. You are building your reputation—your brand—one interaction at a time.

Your assertions set the tone for what others can expect from you. They also motivate you to get the job done as you’ve promised.

Speak the language of success.

Wondering what to read next?

  1. Benefits, Not Boasts
  2. Buy Yourself Time
  3. Honest Commitments: Saying ‘No’ is Kindness
  4. A Trick to Help you Praise At Least Three People Every Day
  5. Avoid the Trap of Desperate Talk

Filed Under: Effective Communication, Sharpening Your Skills Tagged With: Body Language, Communication, Conversations, Likeability, Negotiation, Skills for Success, Social Skills

How to Gain Empathic Insight during a Conflict

May 28, 2020 By Nagesh Belludi Leave a Comment

One simple starting point for finding common ground during a conflict is to ask, “what if the others’ perspectives were true?”

When others tell you something that you don’t agree with, just suspend disbelief for a moment.

Imagine what it is to be like them.

Think, “what if the others’ perspectives are true.”

What would that mean to you?

What would that mean in the context of your shared interests?

How would that change your perspective on your own opinion?

Putting yourself in the other person’s shoes can help you identify how they’re feeling and why they’re feeling that way. This makes it easier to take the big vital step: treating them with empathy and compassion. Suddenly, the conflict is less personal—it’s not about you or them.

Idea for Impact: We human beings are not transformed as much by statistics and facts as we are by stories. When there are two alternative viewpoints of one story, being open-minded, listening honestly, and identifying the other through their stories could be really transformative. It changes the conversation. It helps you move forward and seek solutions that are favorable to both sides.

Wondering what to read next?

  1. Don’t Ignore the Counterevidence
  2. To Make an Effective Argument, Explain Your Opponent’s Perspective
  3. Rapoport’s Rules to Criticize Someone Constructively
  4. Presenting Facts Can Sometimes Backfire
  5. How to Argue like the Wright Brothers

Filed Under: Mental Models, Sharpening Your Skills Tagged With: Communication, Conflict, Conversations, Critical Thinking, Getting Along, Persuasion, Thinking Tools, Thought Process

5 Crucial Tips for Writing Polished Email Marketing Copy

May 20, 2020 By Nagesh Belludi Leave a Comment

So here you are with a great product, service, idea you’d love to offer to the world. You have, everything is ready, you are ready to start and declare about it to the world. You know your next step should be a brand new email campaign. Though the creation of a strong and unique marketing copy is not an easy task. Where should you start? How to create the context? How should it look like? All these questions are piling up before you have even touched your keyboard.

Fortunately, you don’t have to start from scratch on your pursuit. The art of email marketing copy has been exciting for decades now. You don’t have to be an expert to master this technique. Of course, it is constantly changing and evolving. Though, the key ideas are ever the same. So here are our five tips on writing polished email marketing copy.

5 Crucial Tips for Writing Polished Email Marketing Copy

Know Your Audience

First and foremost, you have to decide who your target audience is. If you try to make your email copies appealing to everyone they will most likely fail. Why? An email copy that tries to lure in a wide range of people is never personal. It plays safe, the text is too abstract and the appeal is too weak.

Now, you actually define who is that person you want to sell your idea to. This way you’ll know how to speak directly to that person. This is your target audience now. You need to customize your emails in accordance with the needs and interests of your audience. You are expected to use the language that your audience uses and images that will speak to them directly. Honestly, it is not that hard to do once you have the image and full understanding of the people you are speaking to. Know who they, what they like, what they do and see how your product/idea of service can benefit them. If you sincerely believe that your offer can make their life better, they will feel it in your emails.

Work on that subject line

Once you know who you are addressing your emails to, you are good to write. But here is the trick. No matter how well written, shiny and pretty the body of your email is, people may not even see. Why? Because there is always a chance they will not open your email, to begin with. A person may see a new unrecognized email address in their box and just delete it or send it to spam right away.

People these days are very particular with their time, they don’t like wasting it for no good reason. So, to prevent this from happening to your emails you gotta have a killer subject line. People usually do not look further than that. Thus, your subject line is the key to your success – us it wisely. Create a line that intrigues people. It should promise them a positive outcome, a reward for trusting you in opening the email. You can play with people’s fear to miss out on a good opportunity. Ensure them that their life will benefit from the email that is only one click away. Of course, perfecting subject line writing is a tough job but it requires nothing more from you than time, patience, and practice.

Writing Polished Email Marketing Copy

Don’t Neglect the Preview

On the same not here, be sure to think of the preview text. Usually along with your subject line a.person can see the first few words of your text so keep that in mind. It will tell your potential clients about the context of your email. A few words can give away your written style, the tone for the conversation, and much more. So don’t lose this opportunity for empty words. Start your email nice and strong, leave your readers wanting for more.

Make it Bright and Shiny

Once you have the attention of your readers of is important to maintain it. Even if you have convinced them into opening your email nothing stops them from deleting it within the first few seconds. There are many reasons why this can happen. First, bad grammar and poor language. Nothing looks more unprofessional than that. Second, they are simply not interested in what you are offering. Thirdly, the email does not appeal to them or it is hard to read. That doesn’t take much to fix this issue. All you need to do is to set the right tone for the conversation. Pick an appropriate style, for instance it can be a formal style for a business offer or conversational for other occasions. The body of the email must be short and sweet; with nothing extra but yet thoughtful and well designed. Your paragraphs should be short. Each of them must carry its own main idea and conclusion. Just find a minute to check your text on plagiarism, this plagiarism checker is a game changer. Don’t forget to use it for a better result. Also, try to use strong verbs and active voice. This indicates confidence and reassurance.

Set the Goal Right

Once the email is open and read (by the way, congratulations on this victory) your potential customers should be left with the feeling like they know what to do about all the information they have just received. This means that you need to include an instruction to their further actions. Though before you can do that you need to settle in what goals you are pursuing with this email. Do you want them to buy something? Do you want them to learn more about your product/service? Do you want them to spread the word? What is it exactly that you want from them and why are you writing this in the first place? These questions have to be answered once you start writing.

It will be such a shame to lose customers whose interest you have sparked all due to some confusion in further actions. You must gently guide your readers into the next phase of your marketing strategy. Thus, set the right goals before you start writing and insert it in the summary of your email. That can be a link to your website, a button for subscription, or anything else you want them to do.

Conclusion

We hope you have enjoyed our brief take on the email marketing tips. We know how challenging it can be to start your own business. Though we can assure you that with the right product and good marketing strategy anything is possible. The power of nice and polished email marketing copy is hard to overestimate. A good email can work wonders on your sales as long as you write with a full understanding of why and how you are doing it. So don’t be hesitant to start! Go on, grab your pen or a laptop, and give it a go. We wish you good luck in all your beginnings!

Wondering what to read next?

  1. Here’s a Tactic to Sell Change: As a Natural Progression
  2. The More You Write, The Better You Become
  3. Save Yourself from Email Overload by Checking Email Just Three Times a Day
  4. How to Organize Your Inbox & Reduce Email Stress
  5. Benefits, Not Boasts

Filed Under: Effective Communication Tagged With: Communication, Customer Service, Email, Personal Finance, Thought Process, Writing

What Happens When You Talk About Too Many Goals

February 28, 2020 By Nagesh Belludi Leave a Comment

To supplement this illustrious sketch by the British cartoonist Matt Pritchett, an excerpt from HuffPost’s article on “How Jeremy Corbyn Lost The Election,”

One big problem was the sheer size of the [Labour Party] manifesto and the number of policies on offer. Candidates complained that they didn’t have a single five-point pledge card like the one Tony Blair made famous. While the Tories had a simple message of ‘Get Brexit Done,’ Labour lacked a similarly easy ‘doorstep offer.’ “We had so much in the manifesto we almost had too much,” one senior source said. “It felt like none of it was cutting through. You needed to boil it down.”

“We tried to give a retail offer and also a grand vision and ended up falling between the two stools. To get across ‘you’ll be better off with Labour,’ we should have made our position clearer much earlier.”

Idea for Impact: Distill your goals into simple messages that others will find relevant and timely. When it comes to persuasion, clarity and conciseness are critical. Weak messages meander. Smart messages immediately express what’s important and help rally your resources towards your mission.

Wondering what to read next?

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  3. Everything in Life Has an Opportunity Cost
  4. Never Give a Boring Presentation Again
  5. The Rule of Three

Filed Under: Effective Communication, Mental Models, Sharpening Your Skills Tagged With: Communication, Decision-Making, Etiquette, Goals, Meetings, Persuasion, Presentations, Simple Living, Targets, Thought Process, Winning on the Job

Never Give a Boring Presentation Again

February 13, 2020 By Nagesh Belludi Leave a Comment

When speaking to an audience, clarity and conciseness are critical.

Even the most exciting content can become meaningless if your audience can’t absorb your message.

When preparing a speech, begin at the end

Ask yourself, “If my audience can remember only three points from my presentation, what do I want them to remember?” Distill your message into three six-word bumper stickers. Frame your presentation around those three core messages.

If you’re addressing an audience that you aren’t familiar with, ask the organizers for the names of a half dozen people who will be in the audience. Contact them and find out about their backgrounds and their expectations for your presentation.

Don’t assume that ‘easy to understand’ could be interpreted as ‘too simple.’

Engage your audience effectively by quickly introducing your messages, perhaps with an interesting story or anecdote. Explain why you care your messages so deeply, and convince your audience members that they should, too.

Being short and snappy also helps you finish promptly and show respect for your audience’s schedules.

Idea for Impact: Don’t try to cover too much ground

A great speaker is made not by what they say but by what they choose not to say. Be clear on the purpose of your presentation and let that govern what content you include or exclude.

Wondering what to read next?

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  3. Serve the ‘Lazy Grapefruit’
  4. How to … Make a Memorable Elevator Speech
  5. Jargon Has Its Place in Business Communication

Filed Under: Effective Communication Tagged With: Communication, Etiquette, Meetings, Networking, Persuasion, Presentations

Here’s a Tactic to Sell Change: As a Natural Progression

October 10, 2019 By Nagesh Belludi Leave a Comment

In Venice: The Hinge of Europe, 1081–1797 (1974,) the eminent University of Chicago historian William McNeill outlined how the Venetian Republic shaped European history. Describing the notion of trans-cultural diffusion, he wrote,

When a group of men encounter a commodity, technique, or idea that seems superior to what they had previously known, they will try to acquire and make their own whatever they perceive to be superior, but only as long as this does not seem to endanger other values they hold dear.

University of Washington’s Roger Soder quotes McNeill’s remarks in The Language of Leadership (2001) and supplies a case in point:

This is best illustrated by the technique of Jesuits who brought “new math” [including astronomy and mechanics] to China in the 1600s. They created the myth that the new Western mathematics had in fact evolved out of ancient Chinese ideas. The new ideas, they felt, would be accepted much more readily if they were seen as a natural progression of previously accepted methods.

That’s an important lesson on how to sell change: as a natural progression of the status quo.

Idea for Impact: People find themselves unable or unwilling to make fundamental changes in their lives. They tend to be particularly unwelcoming of ideas that they fear will alienate them from their core values. Tread delicately if you want effective change.

Wondering what to read next?

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  2. Don’t Say “Yes” When You Really Want to Say “No”
  3. What Most People Get Wrong About Focus
  4. Serve the ‘Lazy Grapefruit’
  5. Honest Commitments: Saying ‘No’ is Kindness

Filed Under: Effective Communication, Sharpening Your Skills Tagged With: Assertiveness, Communication, Critical Thinking, Likeability, Negotiation, Persuasion, Relationships, Thought Process

Benefits, Not Boasts

July 18, 2019 By Nagesh Belludi Leave a Comment

Just about every interaction is about selling something, whether you realize it or not.

When you try to be persuasive in a pitch or a presentation, you may come to pass as being overconfident at best, or boastful at worst.

Here’s a method that can help you transform your boasts into benefits in support of a prospective customer.

“I have 15 years of experience in this field,” may sound boastful. Instead, say, “I bring to you 15 years of experience in this field, promising you that, should any problems surface, they will be handled promptly and proficiently.” This tolerable way to promote yourself also won’t make you seem forceful.

More to the point,

  • Avoid self-superiority declarations such as “I am better than others.” Instead, couch your claims as endorsements from others: “My past clients have told me that … .” According to a study by organizational theorist Jeffrey Pfeffer, you’ll be regarded more likable and competent if you can get somebody else (even a paid agent) to sing your praises for you.
  • Steer clear of humblebragging, i.e. masking a boast as a self-deprecating statement as in “I’m a perfectionist at times; it is so hard!” Humblebraggers appear less sincere than blatant braggarts do.

Wondering what to read next?

  1. How to Project Positive Expectations
  2. How to Mediate in a Dispute
  3. Buy Yourself Time
  4. Honest Commitments: Saying ‘No’ is Kindness
  5. Become a Smart, Restrained Communicator Like Benjamin Franklin

Filed Under: Effective Communication, Sharpening Your Skills Tagged With: Communication, Confidence, Conversations, Customer Service, Negotiation, Persuasion, Skills for Success, Social Skills, Winning on the Job

A Trick to Help you Praise At Least Three People Every Day

July 2, 2019 By Nagesh Belludi Leave a Comment

Scott Adams, the American cartoonist who created Dilbert, writes in How to Fail at Almost Everything and Still Win Big (2013),

Children are accustomed to a continual stream of criticisms and praise, but adults can go weeks without a compliment while enduring criticism both at work and at home. Adults are starved for a kind word. When you understand the power of honest praise (as opposed to bullshitting, flattery, and sucking up), you realize that withholding it borders on immoral. If you see something that impresses you, a decent respect to humanity insists you voice your praise.

Lavish Praise on People and They’ll Flourish

In his masterful self-help manual, How to Win Friends and Influence People (1936), Dale Carnegie quotes the American steel magnate Charles M Schwab who was renowned for his people skills,

I consider my ability to arouse enthusiasm among my people, the greatest asset I possess, and the way to develop the best that is in a person is by appreciation and encouragement. …

I am anxious to praise but loath to find fault. If I like anything, I am hearty in my approbation and lavish in my praise. …

I have yet to find the person, however great or exalted his station, who did not do better work and put forth greater effort under a spirit of approval than he would ever do under a spirit of criticism.

Carnegie suggests, “Be lavish with praise, but only in a genuine way … remember, we all crave appreciation and recognition, and will do almost anything to get it. But nobody wants insincerity. Nobody wants flattery.”

How to Praise No Less Than Three People Every Day

Here’s a simple, effective technique to unleash the power of praise and honest appreciation:

  • Start each day with three coins in your left pocket.
  • Transfer one coin to your right pocket each time you praise someone or remark about something favorably. See my previous article on how to recognize people in six easy steps.
  • Make sure that you have all the three coins in your right pocket by the end of the day, but don’t give compliments willy-nilly.

Avoid flattery and pretentiousness, especially when someone thinks that they truly don’t deserve the praise. As well, don’t undercut praise with criticism (as in a sandwich feedback.)

Idea for Impact: If you can’t be bothered with opportunities to elevate others’ day with a few simple words of appreciation, perhaps you’re just too insecure or emotional stingy. Even if praise is directed on others, it emphasizes your own good character—it shows you’re can go beyond self-absorption in the self-consumed society that we live in.

Wondering what to read next?

  1. How Small Talk in Italy Changed My Perspective on Talking to Strangers
  2. How to Accept Compliments Gracefully
  3. You Always Have to Say ‘Good’
  4. Signs Your Helpful Hand Might Stray to Sass
  5. “Are We Fixing, Whinging, or Distracting?”

Filed Under: Effective Communication, Sharpening Your Skills Tagged With: Communication, Conversations, Courtesy, Etiquette, Getting Along, Likeability, Personality, Relationships, Social Skills

Don’t Ignore the Counterevidence

September 14, 2018 By Nagesh Belludi Leave a Comment

Left to themselves, much of our opinions and judgments are subjective, imprecise, incomplete, narrow-minded, or utterly unapprised.

A good critical-thinker deliberates objectively about alternative world-views that may cause him/her to philosophize differently. The English philosopher and economist John Stuart Mill made an unparalleled case for this intellectual obligation in his treatise On Liberty (1859):

If the cultivation of the understanding consists in one thing more than in another, it is surely in learning the grounds of one’s own opinions. Whatever people believe, on subjects on which it is of the first importance to believe rightly, they ought to be able to defend against at least the common objections. … on every subject on which difference of opinion is possible, the truth depends on a balance to be struck between two sets of conflicting reasons. Even in natural philosophy, there is always some other explanation possible of the same facts; some geocentric theory instead of heliocentric, some phlogiston instead of oxygen; and it has to be shown why that other theory cannot be the true one: and until this is shown, and until we know how it is shown, we do not understand the grounds of our opinion. But when we turn to subjects infinitely more complicated, to morals, religion, politics, social relations, and the business of life, three-fourths of the arguments for every disputed opinion consist in dispelling the appearances which favour some opinion different from it. The greatest orator, save one, of antiquity, has left it on record that he always studied his adversary’s case with as great, if not with still greater, intensity than even his own. What Cicero practised as the means of forensic success, requires to be imitated by all who study any subject in order to arrive at the truth. He who knows only his own side of the case, knows little of that. His reasons may be good, and no one may have been able to refute them. But if he is equally unable to refute the reasons on the opposite side; if he does not so much as know what they are, he has no ground for preferring either opinion. The rational position for him would be suspension of judgment, and unless he contents himself with that, he is either led by authority, or adopts, like the generality of the world, the side to which he feels most inclination.

Mill recommends anticipating the potential objections to one’s argument, coming to terms with the merits of opposing points of view, and establishing why the balance of reasons still supports one’s viewpoints:

Ninety-nine in a hundred of what are called educated men are in this condition; even of those who can argue fluently for their opinions. Their conclusion may be true, but it might be false for anything they know: they have never thrown themselves into the mental position of those who think differently from them, and considered what such persons may have to say; and consequently they do not, in any proper sense of the word, know the doctrine which they themselves profess. … So essential is this discipline to a real understanding of moral and human subjects, that if opponents of all important truths do not exist, it is indispensable to imagine them, and supply them with the strongest arguments which the most skilful devil’s advocate can conjure up.

Idea for Impact: Consider objections to your viewpoints; Remain open to alternative interpretations.

Suspend your inclinations and commitments and ask whether any of the objections have some force against your argument.

Don’t argue merely from those premises that appear compelling to you; address the premises that appear compelling to your opponent.

As Aristotle counseled, “The fool tells me his reasons; the wise man persuades me with my own.”

Wondering what to read next?

  1. How to Gain Empathic Insight during a Conflict
  2. To Make an Effective Argument, Explain Your Opponent’s Perspective
  3. Rapoport’s Rules to Criticize Someone Constructively
  4. Presenting Facts Can Sometimes Backfire
  5. How to Argue like the Wright Brothers

Filed Under: Mental Models, Sharpening Your Skills Tagged With: Communication, Conflict, Conversations, Critical Thinking, Getting Along, Persuasion, Thinking Tools, Thought Process

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About: Nagesh Belludi [hire] is a St. Petersburg, Florida-based freethinker, investor, and leadership coach. He specializes in helping executives and companies ensure that the overall quality of their decision-making benefits isn’t compromised by a lack of a big-picture understanding.

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