Right Attitudes

Ideas for Impact

Managing People

Stop Getting Caught in Other People’s Drama

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If you’re drawn to a drama that has nothing to do with you, it’s okay to make yourself available briefly to help others fix their issues. However, beyond the seeming entertainment value of tuning in without any strings or consequences, odds are it’s actively interfering with your responsibilities.

Is getting consumed with other people’s drama just a form of escapism, allowing you to push attention away from stressful or unwelcome events in your own life for a brief amount of time?

To break the pattern of involvement in others’ dramas, shift your perspective and pay attention to what you’ll gain by not getting involved. Getting wrapped up in other people’s drama should never come at the expense of your own well-being.

Idea for Impact: Examine if you’re becoming interested in other people’s dramas because you’re evading your own reality. Set boundaries to preserve your own energy. Face your own life.

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Why Hiring Self-Leaders is the Best Strategy

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The best leaders understand the power of self-leadership. When you have a team of self-leaders, you can step back and let them do what they do best—lead themselves.

To build a team of self-leaders, look for naturally curious, driven, and goal-oriented individuals. Seek out people who can work independently and collaborate with others when needed. These folks only need a little hand-holding, are self-motivated, and take the initiative without being told what to do.

Idea for Impact: With a team of self-leaders, you can focus on the bigger picture and trust that the day-to-day tasks are handled with care. So, consider hiring a team of self-leaders to take your organization to new heights. They’ll get things done efficiently and effectively while freeing you up to focus on what matters most.

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Don’t Overemphasize Hitting Financial Targets

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Research shows placing too much focus on hitting financial targets can have negative effects on employee morale. It can even lead to unethical behavior, such as cutting corners or falsifying data, which can ultimately harm the company’s reputation and financial performance.

When conversations constantly revolve around financial metrics, employees may feel like they’re reduced to mere cogs in the company machine, solely responsible for driving up profits to satisfy shareholders. Instead, foster a connection between employees and the organization’s purpose. Emphasize the intrinsic value of their work and remind them that it’s not just about monetary rewards. Personal growth, meaningful experiences, and recognition are equally important.

Let one message resonate throughout the organization: Your work holds significance beyond financial targets.

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How to Speak Up in Meetings and Disagree Tactfully

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If you find it challenging to speak up in meetings, especially when disagreeing, here’s a helpful framework:

  1. Restate the objective, even if it seems obvious: “Let’s clarify what we aim to achieve here…” This restatement sharpens the focus on the purpose.
  2. Paraphrase someone’s point: “So, if I understand correctly, you’re suggesting…”
  3. Express your concerns or alternative perspective: “I have concerns because…” or “While I see your point, how would we address…”
  4. Be the last to contribute: Your silence piques curiosity and makes your statement more impactful. Incorporate the best ideas expressed and avoid obvious mistakes.

Following this approach, you can tactfully express your thoughts with the right tone and words while seeking common ground.

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Expanding the Narrative: Servant Leadership beyond Christianity

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During the 1970s, Robert Greenleaf, an executive at AT&T, began popularizing a concept that challenged the idea of a heroic leader. He advocated for leaders who embraced humility and empowered their followers to lead.

According to Greenleaf, great leaders see themselves as servants first, and this fundamental understanding sets them apart. He taught, “Servant leadership begins with the natural feeling that one wants to serve, to serve first. Then conscious choice brings one to aspire to lead. That person is sharply different from one who is leader first, perhaps because of the need to assuage an unusual power drive or to acquire material possessions.”

Interestingly, this notion of “leader as a servant” aligns closely with the principles and teachings found in Christian scriptures, where Jesus Christ is often regarded as the ultimate example of a servant leader. Jesus exemplified humility, compassion, and selflessness in his interactions with others. In the Gospel of Mark, he declared, “For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many” (Mark 10:45, NIV.)

While Christianity inspires its leaders to emulate the servant leadership model by prioritizing people, valuing service, and fulfilling their role as stewards, it is essential to note that servant leadership is not exclusive to Christianity. The concept can be found in other religious traditions as well. For instance, even the Śvētāmbara Jain Jñātādharmakathāḥ Sūtra (“Stories of Knowledge and Righteousness”) monastic texts contain elements of servant leadership.

In a past life, the monk Megha was an elephant. Frightened by a forest fire, he created a clearing to provide refuge when the fire next hit. He rushed to the clearing with all the other animals during a future fire. At one stage, he lifted his foot to scratch himself, and when he came to put it down again, he saw that a hare had squeezed into the space. So he stood on three legs for the entire duration of the fire — several days — and as a result, he fell over and died. This exceptionally compassionate act resulted in a human rebirth.

The Mahākapi Jātaka relates Buddha-to-be on his Bodhisattva path:

The story runs that the Bodhisattva was born as a monkey, ruler of over 80,000 monkeys. They lived near the Ganges and ate the fruit of a great mango tree. King Brahmadatta of Benares, desiring to possess the mangoes, surrounded the tree with his soldiers to kill the animals, but the Bodhisattva formed a bridge over the stream with his own body and, by this means, enabled the whole tribe to escape into safety.

Devadatta, the jealous and wicked cousin of the Buddha, was one of the monkeys in that life and, thinking it was a good chance to destroy his enemy, jumped on the Bodhisattva’s back and broke his heart.

The king, seeing the good deed of the Bodhisattva and repenting of his own attempt to kill him, tended to him with great care when he was dying and afterward gave him royal obsequies.

Servant leadership goes beyond any specific faith and encompasses a broader philosophy of putting others and organizations before oneself. It emphasizes the importance of valuing and prioritizing the interests and well-being of others. As the apostle Paul wrote in his letter to the Philippians, “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others” (Philippians 2:3-4, NIV.)

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Thirteen Phrases Your Customers Don’t Want to Hear

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When spoken with a particular tone, specific phrases can instantly infuriate and frustrate customers. Here are some alternatives to consider:

  • Avoid: “I don’t know.” Instead, try “That’s a good question. Let me check and find out.”
  • Avoid: “Just a second.” Instead, try “It could take me a few minutes to get that information. Could you hold while I check, or should I call you back in ten minutes?”
  • Avoid: “Wait.” Instead, try “I haven’t gotten to that yet.”
  • Avoid: “We can’t do that for you.” Instead, try “That’s a tough one. Let me see what I can do.”
  • Avoid: “You’ll have to…” Instead, try “Here’s how we can help you.”
  • Avoid: “That’s not my job.” Instead, try “I usually don’t handle that area, but I know who can help you. Let me see if he’s available.”
  • Avoid: “It’s your fault.” Instead, try “The way this process works is…
  • Avoid: “Why didn’t you do…?” Instead, try “Our process expects you to…”
  • Avoid: “How’s that my concern?” Instead, try, “I understand how upset you are.”
  • Avoid: “I know!” Instead, try “Yes, you’re right.”
  • Avoid: “As I explained earlier… Instead, try “Let’s review the steps again.”
  • Avoid: “Don’t you understand?” Instead, try, “Am I understandable thus far?”
  • Avoid: “Are you done?” Instead, try, “Will there be anything else?”

Master the art of words and deliver customer service messages with a confident, sympathetic tone. Create a personalized list of “Do Say” and “Don’t Say” phrases, drawing from your own experiences.

Reflect on the pain points and communication barriers that specifically frustrated you as a customer during customer service calls, as well as the instances where representatives provided positive interactions. Identify effective approaches and avoid pitfalls when engaging with customers.

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Emotional Intelligence Is Overrated: The Problem With Measuring Concepts Such as Emotion and Intelligence

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In the contemporary landscape, relying solely on cognitive intelligence tests to evaluate the managerial potential of MBA students is increasingly considered inadequate. It has become fashionable for successful managers to need emotional intelligence to thrive in their roles.

Within human resources, there is a growing trend to define an individual’s ability to understand emotional expressions as a form of “intelligence,” measuring it through an emotional quotient (EQ) and considering it a personality trait. However, it is worth noting that people often find it refreshing to shed the façade they present in public and freely express their genuine thoughts, emotions, and actions in informal “off-the-record” situations rather than conforming to formalities during official meetings.

While some proponents argue that EQ encompasses all dimensions of managerial success that IQ fails to measure, this widely accepted viewpoint lacks credible scientific evidence. Unlike IQ, a clearly defined measure of cognitive abilities, there is no agreed-upon definition of emotional intelligence, and various EQ tests produce vastly different results. Moreover, societal biases and cultural upbringing can significantly influence EQ scores. Indeed, the claim that EQ is twice as vital as IQ is an entirely baseless and unproven assertion.

Emotional intelligence is an intricate and dynamic concept encompassing a broad spectrum of emotional competencies, social skills, and self-awareness. Attempting to simplify it into a single score may not adequately capture its subtleties and complexities.

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From the Inside Out: How Empowering Your Employees Builds Customer Loyalty

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At a time when apathy and distrust are so endemic in many organizations, some companies have nurtured employee loyalty to create customer loyalty flourish. The following case studies will substantiate the cultivation of a positive work environment that prioritizes employee recognition and support invariably results in exceptional customer service.

The Nordstrom Way: Enabling Employees to Have the Freedom and Vision to Become Self-Directing

Nordstrom’s founders created a culture that prioritized a “worshipful relationship” with its luxury department store customers and empowered employees to do everything they could to please them. The Nordstrom Handbook emphasizes outstanding customer service and encourages employees to set high personal and professional goals, expressing confidence in their abilities. The company’s Rule 1 reads: “Use good judgment in all situations. There will be no additional rules. Please feel free to ask your department manager, store manager, or division manager any question at any time.” Nordstrom’s success is a testament to empowering employees and supporting policies prioritizing exceptional customer service.

Flying the Fun Skies at Southwest Airlines: Giving Employees the Freedom to Deliver a Great Brand Experience

Southwest Airlines achieved great success early on due to its committed and motivated workforce. Founder Herb Kelleher recognized the importance of prioritizing employee satisfaction to create a culture of caring for one another and providing excellent customer service. Kelleher famously said, “The business of business is people—yesterday, today, and forever. If the employees aren’t satisfied, they won’t provide the product we need.”

To create a positive work environment, Southwest Airlines encouraged fun among its employees, setting it apart from other airlines that were considered dull and unappealing. Celebrating employees and their families is deeply ingrained in Southwest Airlines’ culture, and it is evident in the prominent display of pictures capturing these special moments throughout their office spaces. This people-centric culture helped the company attract and retain talented workers passionate about their jobs and provide top-notch customer service, which made flying with the airline a fun experience. Despite the potential cost savings, Kelleher remained committed to celebrating employees with parties, banquets, gifts, birthday cards, and outings, citing the value of having the fewest customer complaints in the industry.

Beyond the Call of Duty: Ladies and Gentlemen Serving Ladies and Gentlemen at Ritz-Carlton

The Ritz Carlton is renowned for its exceptional customer service, with the empowerment of employees being a critical factor in their approach. The company’s philosophy of “Ladies and Gentlemen Taking Care of Ladies and Gentlemen” highlights the importance of treating customers and employees with respect and dignity. Regardless of their rank and title, employees can spend up to $2,000 per day per guest without seeking supervisor approval to solve problems and deliver personalized and unforgettable guest experiences. This approach may seem costly, but it empowers employees to use their judgment to create memorable and personal experiences for guests. One of my friends enjoyed staying at a Ritz-Carlton hotel a few months ago, where he ordered a burger and a milkshake. Unfortunately, the hotel did not offer milkshakes, so he settled for a glass of water. However, to his amazement, the waitress surprised him with a milkshake to accompany his burger. She went the extra mile without being prompted by scouring the kitchen for milk, ice cream, and cold milk to create the shake.

Idea for Impact: Empowering Employees is a Strategic Approach That Yields Significant Benefits

Empowering employees goes beyond providing the necessary tools and training; it fosters a culture of trust, autonomy, and ownership.

How you treat your employees directly impacts how they treat your customers. When you prioritize making your staff feel appreciated and supported, they are more likely to provide exceptional customer service. A positive work environment can foster innovation and creativity within your organization while attracting and retaining top talent.

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Avoid Trigger Words: Own Your Words with Grace and Care

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Using phrases like “you should,” “you never,” and “you’re supposed to” can immediately put the other person on the defensive.

  • When making statements, it’s better to begin with “I feel” or “I’d like.” By using “I” statements, nobody can argue with the fact that you feel a certain way.
  • Take responsibility for your words. Instead of protesting with phrases like “Don’t be late as usual,” which only reinforce complaints, try inviting positive change by saying, “It would be helpful for me if you could arrive early tonight, maybe by six.”
  • Saying “I don’t care” or “You choose” might not make you seem pleasant and agreeable. The other person may resent being forced to make decisions on your behalf.
  • Phrases like “I hate to be a pain, but…” or “I could be wrong, but…” undermine your request before you even make it.
  • Saying “I know” can make you appear irritating, self-important, or unreceptive. Instead, using “You’re right” doesn’t belittle something the other person may have just realized. “Yes, that’s on my mind!” acknowledges the other person’s reminder.
  • If someone apologizes anxiously, don’t say, “Stop saying sorry.” Instead, saying, “You have nothing to apologize for,” is more reassuring and won’t make the other person feel awkward.

Idea for Impact: Using direct and concise language strengthens the message and clarifies your needs. Be mindful of language that may unintentionally cause offense, distress, or discomfort to others. Prioritizing empathy and open-mindedness can contribute to maintaining respectful and inclusive conversations.

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Labeling Damage

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Labels not only stereotype individuals but also limit and stifle them. Even so-called positive labels like “little miss perfect” perpetuate harmful stereotypes and can be internalized. Labels create walls around people, making it difficult for them to break free from preconceived notions.

Instead of oversimplifying people’s traits and characteristics with labels, let’s celebrate individuality by avoiding labels altogether. Let’s embrace the complexity of each person and acknowledge their unique qualities.

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