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Nagesh Belludi

No Swearing & Profanity: Mind Your Language

July 23, 2009 By Nagesh Belludi 2 Comments

Last week, Time Magazine discussed research that suggests that using curse words can help cope with physical pain. This reminds me of a 2007 research that implies that regular swearing helps employees better express their feelings in stressful circumstances and boosts team morale.

Such research is misleading in that the findings may be perceived as approving of profanity at work. As work environments have become more laid-back over the years, swearing is more commonplace than in the past, especially in blue-collar environments and certain other workplace cultures.

Harry S. Dennis III of The Executive Committee (TEC) in Wisconsin and Michigan explores two bases for the tolerance of profanity in workplaces.

  • The laid-back we-are-all-in-this-together culture is almost like a fraternity environment. The use of profanity somehow communicates a symbolic unity. Employees believe that their degree of comfort with one another means it’s OK to let down their guard. It becomes a casual exchange and falsely suggests a degree of communication intimacy.
  • In the hard-driving aggressive environment, employees use profanity to communicate urgency, a need for action. Most swear words are one syllable, so they carry a bullet-like impact and light a fire under the butt of the person on the receiving end so they get the job done. It is, in fact, a terrible negative motivator.

Bill Gates and Steve Ballmer at Microsoft, Bob Nardelli at Home Depot, Carol Betz at Yahoo! and other executives are reported to have cussed at work. When leaders and managers swear without restraint to express annoyance at an employee, colleague, competitor, customer or circumstance, the message they convey to their organizations is that profanity is acceptable. This is akin to potty-mouthed parents hinting that it is probably OK for their watchful kids to use curse words.

Swearing and poor language is not acceptable in any professional setting. Swearing is dysfunctional to the cohesiveness of teams. Many employees find use of expletives as discourteous and quickly lose respect for those using profane language. Managers’ abusive management style can quickly intimidate employees who may hesitate to speak out.

Bad language is unacceptable behavior. Organizations should require that employees exercise common sense and avoid using colorful language. HR must deal with issues of swearing in the workplace as they occur and institute disciplinary procedures to prevent charges of workplace bullying, abuse or discrimination. Leaders and managers should curb their own language and comply privately and publicly. Employees, even high-performing ones, who repeatedly disregard such requirements and undermine the trust and morale of workplace environments must go openly.

Wondering what to read next?

  1. Four Telltale Signs of an Unhappy Employee
  2. Why Your Employees Don’t Trust You—and What to Do About it
  3. Fear of Feedback: Won’t Give, Don’t Ask
  4. David Ogilvy on Russian Nesting Dolls and Building a Company of Giants
  5. Competency Modeling: How to Hire and Promote the Best

Filed Under: Managing People Tagged With: Communication, Great Manager

Self-Assessment Quiz: How Stressed are You?

July 21, 2009 By Nagesh Belludi 1 Comment

The first step to overcome the causes and effects of stress is to acknowledge stress and become aware of its symptoms. By identifying the following telltale signs of stress, you can take steps to manage them.

Evaluate your level of stress by taking a simple quiz that I developed recently. Rate your experience against each category of stress symptoms in the following list. Score 1 for “Rarely”, 2 for “On occasion lately”, 3 for “Often” and 4 for “A lot lately.”

  • Irritability, nervous temperament, moodiness, short temper, aggressiveness
  • Lack of enthusiasm, neglect of responsibilities
  • Inability to relax, concentrate, focus, or remember
  • Poor health, body aches, pains, indigestion, constipation, nausea, etc.
  • Eating and sleeping more or less, poor hygiene, substance abuse
  • Nervous habits: fidgeting, foot tapping, nail biting, giggling, etc.
  • Excessive frustration, cynicism, paranoia, distrust or worry
  • Feeling of loneliness, withdrawal from friends and family
  • Reluctance to express opinions, feeling of being “used” by others
  • Excessive sensitivity, feeling of being overwhelmed
  • Indecisiveness, poor judgment, unwillingness to take risks, impatience
  • Blaming self for problems, evoking past distresses or sorrow demanding attention, aggressiveness
  • Feeling of lack of control and authority, pressure to yield to demands

Assess Your Level of Stress

Tally up your scores and rate yourself on the following scale. The more symptoms you observe in your everyday life, the more stressed you are.

  • 18 or lesser indicates a normal level of stress. Stress is an essential part of existence.
  • 19 to 25 indicates that you may be facing a brown-out. The temporary hardships you are experiencing may intensify your level of stress if you do not address their causes immediately.
  • 26 to 34 indicates acute level of stress. Carefully address everything that bothers you and consider changes to your lifestyle. Seek therapy.
  • 35 or greater indicates potentially serious consequences to your wellbeing. Seek medicinal or therapeutic help.

Filed Under: Health and Well-being

Inspirational Quotations #281

July 19, 2009 By Nagesh Belludi Leave a Comment

Be more willing to be impressed than eager to impress.
—Anonymous

I have learned to seek my happiness by limiting my desires, rather than in attempting to satisfy them.
—John Stuart Mill (English Philosopher, Economist)

I don’t think much of a man who is not wiser today than he was yesterday.
—Abraham Lincoln (American Head of State)

Nothing is ever lost by courtesy. It is the cheapest of the pleasures; costs nothing and conveys much. It pleases him who gives and him who receives, and thus, like mercy, is twice blessed.
—Erastus Wiman (Canadian Journalist)

Human history becomes more and more a race between education and catastrophe.
—H. G. Wells (British Novelist)

Integrity without knowledge is weak and useless, and knowledge without integrity is dangerous and dreadful.
—Samuel Johnson (British Essayist)

The greatest achievement of the human spirit is to live up to one’s opportunities and make the most of one’s resources.
—Luc de Clapiers, marquis de Vauvenargues (French Moralist)

We are much harder on people who betray us in small ways than on people who betray others in great ones.
—Francois de La Rochefoucauld

We each have all the time there is; our mental and moral status is determined by what we do with it.
—Mary Blake

In everything the middle course is best:
all things in excess bring trouble to men.
—Plautus (Titus Maccius Plautus) (Roman Playwright)

Filed Under: Inspirational Quotations

Email Tips: Delegating to Another’s Employee

July 15, 2009 By Nagesh Belludi Leave a Comment

Here are six guidelines to delegate work to an employee who does not directly report to you. These guidelines are applicable even when you delegate to one of your employees’ employees.

  • When requesting a routine work from an employee, copy her boss as a courtesy. Such requests must be components of the employee’s work plan or previously agreed to by her boss.
  • When delegating special or time-consuming work to an employee, first write to her boss and request for the employee’s time. Do not go around the boss.
  • Provide all the necessary inputs and describe what you expect, and how and when you expect results. Be specific. Ask for timely updates.
  • If you have not gotten a response to an earlier delegation email, call or visit the person. Confirm that the employee understands your expectations. Ask for a status update.
  • Do not “copy up” (copy the boss or, worse, HR) as a means of coercion. Work with the employee directly to resolve problems before elevating your concerns to her boss.
  • Avoid prolonged debates or arguments over email. Problems are often easier to defuse using a more personal means of interaction. If you have difficulty in saying something via email, pick up the phone or walk up to the other and talk to her.

More on Effective Delegation

  • Delegate outcomes, not just tasks
  • On failing to distinguish accountability from responsibility
  • Four telltale signs of an unhappy employee

Wondering what to read next?

  1. Making It Happen: Book Summary of Bossidy’s ‘Execution’
  2. How to Stop “Standing” Meetings from Clogging Up Your Time
  3. Do Your Employees Feel Safe Enough to Tell You the Truth?
  4. What Knowledge Workers Want Most: Management-by-Exception
  5. No One Likes a Meddling Boss

Filed Under: Managing People Tagged With: Delegation, Email, Great Manager

Inspirational Quotations #280

July 11, 2009 By Nagesh Belludi Leave a Comment

Concentrate all your thoughts upon the work at hand. The sun’s rays do not burn until brought to a focus.
—Alexander Graham Bell (Scottish-born American Inventor)

Security is mostly a superstition. It does not exist in nature. Avoiding danger is no safer in the long run than outright exposure. Life is either a daring adventure, or nothing.
—Helen Keller (American Author)

Let us be thankful for the fools. But for them the rest of us could not succeed.
—Mark Twain (American Humorist)

How does one measure time? No, not in day, months, or years. It is measured by the most precious of all things: Love. Without which all beings and things whether brave and/or beautiful would perish.
—Irish Blessing

I don’t know why we are here, but I’m pretty sure that it is not in order to enjoy ourselves.
—Ludwig Wittgenstein (Austrian Philosopher)

What you can do, or think you can, begin it.
—Johann Wolfgang von Goethe (German Poet)

You can complain because roses have thorns, or you can rejoice because thorns have roses.
—Tom Wilson

My library is my kingdom, and here I try to make my rule absolute-shutting off this single nook from wife, daughter and society. Elsewhere I have only a verbal authority, and vague. Unhappy is the man, in my opinion, who has no spot at home where he can be at home to himself-to court himself and hide away.
—Michel de Montaigne (French Philosopher)

For lo, the winter is past, the rain is over and gone; the flowers appear on the earth; the time of the singing of birds is come, and the voice of the turtledove is heard in our land.
—Song of Solomon

Mediocrity knows nothing higher than itself, but talent instantly recognizes genius.
—Arthur Conan Doyle (English Novelist)

I hear the words, the thoughts, the feeling tones, the personal meaning, even the meaning that is below the conscious intent of the speaker. Sometimes too, in a message which superficially is not very important, I hear a deep human cry that lies buried and unknown far below the surface of the person. So I have learned to ask myself, can I hear the sounds and sense the shape of this other person’s inner world? Can I resonate to what he is saying so deeply that I sense the meanings he is afraid of, yet would like to communicate, as well as those he knows?
—Carl Rogers (American Psychologist)

Filed Under: Inspirational Quotations

Inspirational Quotations #279

July 5, 2009 By Nagesh Belludi Leave a Comment

Good fortune follows honesty.|Fame follows sacrifice.|Education follows practice.|Intelligence follows hard work.
—Subhashita Manjari

Discover the power of praise—it will make your world a better place.
—Unknown

We eat change for breakfast!
—Harry V. Quadracci

Fear is death, fear is sin, fear is hell, fear is unrighteousness, fear is wrong life. All the negative thoughts and ideas that are in the world have proceeded from this evil spirit of fear.
—Swami Vivekananda (Indian Hindu Mystic)

People are beginning to see that the first requisite to success in life is to be a good animal.
—Herbert Spencer (English Polymath)

Don’t be afraid of polarizing people.
—Guy Kawasaki (American Investor)

Hard work and light food – this is the readily available medicine for any disease. If you do these daily, you shall not be afraid of any ailment.
—Subhashita Manjari

Loud laughter is the mirth of the mob, who are only pleased with silly things; for true Wit or good Sense never excited a laugh since the creation of the world. A man of parts and fashion is therefore often seen to smile, but never heard to laugh.
—Earl of Chesterfield

This is the true joy in life: Being used for a purpose recognized by yourself as a mighty one, being a force of nature instead of a feverish, selfish little clod of ailments and grievances, complaining that the world will not devote itself to making you happy. I am of the opinion that my life belongs to the whole community and as long as I live, it is my privilege to do for it what I can. It is a sort of splendid torch which I have got hold of for the moment and I want to make it burn as brightly as possible before handing it on to future generations.
—George Bernard Shaw (Irish Playwright)

Everything comes if a man will only wait.
—Benjamin Disraeli (British Head of State)

Filed Under: Inspirational Quotations

No Need to List References Before an Interview

June 30, 2009 By Nagesh Belludi 2 Comments

In response to my previous article on why résumés should not list references, blog reader Ana Maria inquired, “I’ve been asked to provide references before an interview. What should I do?”

Short answer: decline politely. Say, “I prefer to give you a list of references after my interview.” Here is why.

References are relevant only during the later part of the recruiting process, i.e. after a prospective employer has interviewed you and desires to check others’ impressions of you prior to extending you an offer.

As a candidate, you should choose to describe yourself first to the prospective employer in an interview. Your references should represent your credentials only after you and the employer have established a mutual interest. This is the established protocol.

Besides, providing references after an interview is respectful of your references. You would not want to bother your references too often or make public their contact information.

The above guideline holds even if you are interviewing through a contracting firm or recruitment agency. Such intermediaries routinely complete reference checks before they present worthy candidates to their clients/recruiters. For that reason, the recruiting agency may contact your references after an initial interview with a representative of the agency. Subsequently, the agency may forward your references’ opinions to a prospective employer, but should not pass your references’ contact information.

Wondering what to read next?

  1. Job Interviewing #2: Interviewing with a Competitor of your Current Employer
  2. Interviewing Skills #3: Avoid Second-Person Answers
  3. Interviewing Skills #4: Avoid too many ‘I-I-I’ or ‘We-We-We’ answers
  4. Competency Modeling: How to Hire and Promote the Best
  5. Say It Straight: Why Clarity Beats Precision in Everyday Conversation

Filed Under: Career Development Tagged With: Interviewing

Inspirational Quotations #278

June 28, 2009 By Nagesh Belludi Leave a Comment

Be not afraid of life. Believe that life is worth living
and your belief will help create the fact.
— William James

To be wronged is nothing,
unless you continue to remember it.
— Confucius

In the end we’ll remember
not the words of our enemies,
but the silence of our friends.
— Martin Luther King, Jr.

Basically, I no longer work for anything
but the sensation I have while working.
— Alberto Giacometti

Against stupidity, the Gods themselves contend in vain.
— Friedrich Schiller

Tact is the knack of making a point without making an enemy.
— Isaac Newton

Dirt is matter out of place.
Weed is a plant out of place.
Nuisance is action out of place.
Even those things, acts or words which are normally good
and useful become bad, useless and even harmful when
they are out of place, time and circumstance.
A knowledge of this fact is an essential part of wisdom.
— Swami Krishnananda

In every work of genius we recognize our own rejected thoughts: they come back to us with certain alienated majesty.
— Ralph Waldo Emerson

A witty saying proves nothing.
— Voltaire

Learn that the present hour alone is man’s.
— Samuel Johnson

Filed Under: Inspirational Quotations

Links from Around the Web

June 26, 2009 By Nagesh Belludi Leave a Comment

  • Instructions for Life Instructions for Life. 43 quotes of wisdom and flashes of insight. My personal favorites: (1) When you say, “I’m sorry,” look the person in the eye. (2) Once a year, go someplace you’ve never been before. (3) Judge your success by what you had to give up in order to get it.
  • Ten Fatal Flaws that Derail Leaders. Often, leaders do not realize their mistakes or try to hide them rather than owning up to them. Effective leaders have the capability to spot their own mistakes, reflect on them and recognize how to correct them. Here is a list of ten obvious leadership lapses. Use this “to-avoid” list to assess your own performance and reflect on what you may need to do differently.
  • Finding Patience at Work. “Our lives at work are filled with difficulty. Patience requires that we fully and directly face our difficulties, that we embrace and learn from situations and from our feelings about them. Owning and transforming our pain and disappointment can be a tremendous challenge, as well as a tremendous gift.” Quote from “Z.B.A.: Zen of Business Administration,” Marc Lesser. Source: The Daily Dharma from Tricycle magazine
  • Holmes and Rahe Stress Scale. An easy and effective test to measure how recent life events could lead to stress and illness.
  • What Do You Tell Your Boss and When? Fortune magazine columnist Stanley Bing offers this quiz to help assess your communication style with your boss. My blog has previously discussed the importance of keeping your boss in line and suiting his preferred style of communication.
  • Compilation of the Funniest Résumé Mistakes. Amusing examples of vagaries, mistakes and overstretched qualifications on résumés of job applicants.

Filed Under: Ideas and Insights

Inspirational Quotations #277

June 24, 2009 By Nagesh Belludi Leave a Comment

Poetry lifts the veil from the hidden beauty of the world, and makes familiar objects be as if they were not familiar.
—Percy Bysshe Shelley (English Poet)

Speak little, do much.
—Benjamin Franklin (American Political leader)

In a mad world only the mad are sane.
—Akira Kurosawa (Japanese Film Director)

There are forces in life working for you and against you. One must distinguish the beneficial forces from the malevolent ones and choose correctly between them.
—A. P. J. Abdul Kalam (Indian Head of State, Scientist)

One who has control over the mind is tranquil in heat and cold, in pleasure and pain, and in honor and dishonor; and is ever steadfast with the Supreme Self.
—The Bhagavad Gita (Hindu Scripture)

The honorary duty of a human being is to love.
—Maya Angelou (American Poet)

No virtue is more universally accepted as a test of good character than trustworthiness.
—Harry Emerson Fosdick (American Baptist Clergyman)

A powerful agent is the right word. Whenever we come upon one of those intensely right words in a book or a newspaper the resulting effect is physical as well as spiritual, and electrically prompt.
—Mark Twain (American Humorist)

The responsibility of the executive is (1) to create and maintain a sense of purpose and moral code for the organization; (2) to establish systems of formal and informal communication; and (3) to ensure the willingness of people to cooperate.
—Chester Barnard (American Businessperson)

Wheresoever you go, go with all your heart.
—Confucius (Chinese Philosopher)

Filed Under: Inspirational Quotations

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About: Nagesh Belludi [hire] is a St. Petersburg, Florida-based freethinker, investor, and leadership coach. He specializes in helping executives and companies ensure that the overall quality of their decision-making benefits isn’t compromised by a lack of a big-picture understanding.

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